Nothing Left to Lose - Part Two

Chapter Two

Despite sitting and talking to her mother into the early hours, Heidi still woke early the next morning, which she was glad about. After all, she was in a warm sun kissed paradise for a very short amount of time. Jumping up, she showered, then packed a bag for the beach. It was silent in the house as she made her way downstairs, and again Heidi was glad about that. She appreciated the chance to put some distance, some space between her and her mother or rather her intricate love life. Taking a bottle of water from the fridge, she called a taxi and left.

The closest beach was as long and as white as the beach of her memories. She stopped the cab as soon as she could see the sea, then strolled along the front enjoying the sights and sounds that confronted her. At a small booth she bought a grilled sandwich and a coffee, then carried on her route to the sand. She didn’t stop until she saw a perfectly positioned sun bed, just under a shade, equidistant between the road and the sea. It was still early, but already the tourists were flocking to the beach in droves. So she headed towards it, and settled to enjoy the warmth and the peace and quiet of the location, and to read her book. She was determined not to get embroiled in work today. This was her chance to relax. She pulled off her t-shirt and shorts and reclined in her new bikini. Not the most body confident, a designer working in a world of glamorous models was enough to make her conscious of her excess weight and curves. But no one knew her there, so she relaxed and lounged back.

Her phone buzzed after she’d been there an hour. She wasn’t going to check it, but when she glanced down she saw a message from Sadie her best mate.

                “Enjoying the sunshine girlfriend? Dying to hear all about your mother’s Lothario. Call me when you get chance?”

The message made her laugh, was there anyone as perfect as a best friend for knowing JUST what to say at the right time? She pocketed the phone after a quick response “Of course. Tonight, xxx”. Half of her had hoped that it was an apology from Casey; she’d spent part of the previous evening trying to explain her relationship with him to her mother. Badly. He’d stormed out and not even called or texted since. And it hadn’t really bothered her. Her mother had asked her if she loved him. No. Did her heart surge when he walked in the room? When her mother had asked that she’d looked at her in surprise, that had seen her mother’s face drop. Was it that bad?

Leaning back on the lounger she closed her eyes, she didn’t believe her heart would ever pound at the sight of a man, but she could accept there was no spark in her tryst with Casey.

It was wonderful to feel the sun kissing her skin, and even more the sand running through her toes. Whenever Heidi was at home, she forgot how beautiful it was to be close to beautiful beaches and warm seas. Today, this was her time. So she once again switched off, to home, to work...and to Casey.

As lunchtime approached she strolled into the sea to cool off. The sea here was shallow for as far as she could see, and she loved the warm water flowing around her ankles and calves. She was reapplying sunscreen when she spotted her mother approaching a bar on the fringe of the sand.

Pulling an aqua coloured sarong around her waist, she strolled across the beach to meet her.

                “Cesare is coming later; he called me an hour ago.” Barbara Mortimer, the epitome of glamour, was perched on a high stool at the wooden bar in a bright kaftan and wide legged white linen trousers. She’d removed the large straw sunhat, but the dark sunshades still covered her eyes.

Heidi nodded, pulling up a seat next to her, “I’m looking forward to meeting him. I need to know if he’s good enough for you!”

Barbara laughed, “Talk about role reversal!” She had a glass of some sparkling drink in front of her and sipped it through the straw. “I always did think that I’d be planning your or Lucas’ wedding by now, rather than my own...I’m starting to doubt that either of you will ever marry now, and I’ll never have grandchildren!”

Heidi bit back the pain that this conversation always brought, blinking furiously to hide tears, she turned to her mother and smiled an elusive smile, knowing deep inside that she’d likely never marry...or have children.

A taxi took them to what Heidi could only presume was a very exclusive restaurant at a small harbour town along the coast. As they entered, her mother instantly changed, her features softening as she turned to wave. Cesare was sat at a prime table overlooking the stunning coastline and he stood as they approached. Which almost made Heidi laugh, as he was a lot shorter than she expected, but with his dark curly hair without a hint of grey and thick equally dark moustache, he looked every inch the clichéd Greek man, and his smile, which widened when he saw them made him instantly likeable, instantly friendly.

                “Ah Barbara!” He gushed reaching for her hand to kiss it elegantly. “If I didn’t know different I’d swear this was your beautiful younger sister...” he turned to kiss Heidi’s hand, before raising his eyes back to her mother, “but as it is you do not look old enough to have a daughter this age!”

Heidi chuckled, for some reason this man was loveable, his flattery genuine, she knew that from anyone else she’d have raised her eyebrows and walked away. But she could see how strong the affection was between the two.

                “So!” he started pulling seats out for them both to sit, “tell me how you are agápi mou.” My love. Barbara smiled in his attention and Heidi suddenly felt like she was in the way! She was grateful for the menu that needed perusing, anything rather than watching the two make eyes at each other. She’d been studying it for just a few seconds when she felt a presence to her right, heat flushed up her face before she’d even looked up to see who was staring at her.

Cosmo was floored, he’d joined Cesare for dinner many times, but never had he seen the woman who had attracted his eyes from the very second he stepped into the restaurant. He imagined the older woman was Barbara, Cesare’s fiancée, whilst he’d not met her, that was logical. But the other woman. He sighed, from her auburn hair piled up on her head, to her slender neck, straight nose and full lips; he could only describe her as a dream. She was wearing a dress that barely concealed the luscious curves that he instantly wanted to run his hands over. He’d never felt such a strong attraction to a woman before.

Then she looked up, she’d sensed him staring. The other couple were two besotted with each other to notice. Instead, as he wove his way between the tables towards the three, he found he was getting lost in her eyes as she studied him as brazenly as he eyeballed her. And it felt as though someone had just turned the air conditioning off.

Beautiful. If he hadn’t been, then Heidi knew she’d be able to breathe, to move, to look away. But this man mesmerised her, and he was walking straight towards her, sliding elegantly between the tables. She knew she’d never seen a man this beautiful before, he was tall but he carried the suit he wore well, he was broad, yet not huge, his skin olive, and his dark hair reached to his collar. But it was those dark eyes that entranced her, warm dark eyes that fit perfectly with his angled cheek bones and square stubble-darkened jaw.

He’d almost reached the table when Cesare spotted him and jumped up, and his eyes retained that glint as he saw her still staring, then he was engulfed in Cesare’s embrace.

The hug was prolonged and Heidi could see that Cesare was whispering into the other man’s ear, but eventually they separated, and both turned to the now very curious women.

                “Beautiful Barbara, this is my son-in-law and business partner, Cosmo Fotakis. Cosmo, this is my fiancée Barbara Mortimer, and her equally beautiful daughter Heidi! I asked him to join us for dinner as both my children are away.”

Son-in-law, Heidi couldn’t fully process that, other than to realise that the title reinforced what the ring she’d suddenly spotted on the man’s left hand had hinted at. Whilst he was beautiful, god-like, he was also married. Taken.

When her mother stood to greet the man, she got to her feet too. But it was with some reluctance that she accepted the embrace and kiss of greeting from Cosmo, and as his rough cheek brushed hers, his lips connecting with her soft skin, Heidi actually gasped as a spark of electricity ravished her body. Pulling away she met Cosmo’s eyes and saw the same stunned expression on his face. He felt it too. But before she’d processed that thought he had quickly guarded his emotions and lowered himself in to the empty chair beside her.

Heidi had never struggled for conversation, she was well educated and had seen and experienced a wide variety of situations. She enjoyed debating, and was well versed on current affairs.  But as she relaxed back into her seat, she was at a loss for words, not a feeling she was exactly used to. But she needed time to compose herself, to work out what she wanted to say, so she sat back and watched the others converse. It was so obvious that Cesare was captivated with her mother, he was continually attentive to her every whim, and she noted how Cosmo’s eyes crinkled with amusement as he watched his father-in-law, at the same time revealing perfectly straight white teeth. Was there nothing imperfect about this man?

They were well into their first course when Cosmo turned to Heidi. “Are you always this quiet?”

His voice was devoid of accent, but his pronunciation was exact, a sign that English was not his natural language, not that it wasn’t impeccable. And it was husky, sensual. She had to shake herself free of that. She wasn’t someone who dabbled with married men. She wouldn’t do that. So instead, she shrugged trying to feign a casual smile, “this has all been a bit unexpected for me!” She gestured in the direction of her mother and Cesare who were embroiled in an intimate conversation.

He nodded knowingly, “it is strange also to see my grumpy father-in-law so besotted, it’s amusing!”

She gulped awkwardly, unable to avoid the topic any longer, “so you’re married to Cesare’s daughter?”

Cosmo studied her for a moment longer than necessary, then smiled an unconvincing smile, “yes, Eleni.”

She struggled to get over the disappointment that flooded through her, despite it all, she was hoping that she’d interpreted things wrongly, eventually adding, “I know so little about his family. I only found out about him yesterday, and met him an hour ago.”

 “It’s unusual, hey? For the child to have to approve the parent’s choice!” When she smiled, he leaned back in his chair, and continued, “Cesare has two children, Eleni, she’d twenty nine, and the apple of her father’s eye. And her younger brother is called Nikos. He’s twenty three and in Oxford studying Chemistry, a Masters; he has the brains of the family.”

Heidi was captivated by his attention, smiling awkwardly, she asked, “and Eleni?”

Cosmo laughed out loud, then grinned at her, “what does she do? Now I KNOW you’ve heard nothing about my wife! She’s a fulltime attraction!” When Heidi looked puzzled, he added, “She spends her life looking good, she does an occasional modelling contract, but mostly, she spends my money and shops!”

Heidi was horrified, he was married, the first man she’d felt an attraction to in years, was married, to a model...presumably an extremely beautiful woman...who had no need to work...jealous much? 

Nothing Left to Lose - Part One

Chapter One

A/N So after the writer’s block and delays, for the first time ever I am abandoning the last story. I’ve not given up on it, I’ll go back to it, but I really need to get my mojo back. This is a story that I started to post years ago on a different site (can’t remember where) but I want to revamp and finish. Hopefully that’ll free me up then to complete You Got It Wrong. So sorry to disappoint.

All comments gratefully received.

“She’s getting married!”

Heidi Mortimer wished she’d never picked up the phone, she was tempted to drop her head onto her desk and close her ears, but she couldn’t. She heard the voice, knew it was her brother’s, but couldn’t contemplate who ‘she’ was.  Holding the phone at arm’s length, she looked at it quizzically, then returned it to her ear. “What? Who?”

Lucas laughed, “mother dearest! She’s getting married. Seven months a widow, and all of a sudden she’s in love AND getting married!”

Heidi sat down abruptly, glad that she was near a comfy chair; this was all rather sudden, and horrendously bizarre. She hated that she could feel tears prickle at her eyes, her heart had broken when her father had died, and it was all still so raw that she couldn’t imagine that her mother was ready to move on already. But then what would she know? She’d barely spoken to her mother in that time, let alone visited her in the family home in Cyprus. “Really?”

She could hear Lucas breathing erratically as he paced the room, a mannerism so typically him, she could vividly imagine him pacing his riverside pad, probably stepping between some of the many women who throw themselves at him regularly. He never could resist a desperate female, and wow, did they all seem to love him. “Oh yes, really! He is apparently a Greek shipping magnate, and they are head over heels in love.”

                “Shit!” Heidi leaned back in the chair and closed her eyes, “this all sounds rather surreal.”

Lucas laughed out loud, “that little sis is an understatement...but the fact that he’s rich, successful, and means we may a little less to worry about?”

                “I suppose you’re right. It sounds selfish, but I know where you’re coming from, at least she isn’t going to end up penniless in a couple of years...so how do you know all this?”

Chuckling again he replied, “I have my spies.”

                “You heard it via Fred?” she closed her eyes letting her head hang back. Since the first day of primary school he’d been inseparable best friends with Freddie. Coincidentally both their mothers were also best friends.  Over the years Cheryl, had been the font of all knowledge when it came to their mother, all relayed via Freddie.

Lucas was spluttering and it dragged her back to the here and now, “actually Cheryl herself called me! I think she’s secretly concerned it’s too soon. We need to check up on her, don’t we?”

Heidi thought for a few moments, “does this mean I’ve got to drop everything and head to Cyprus?”

Lucas sighed, “you handle her so much better than I can do.”

                “Coward!” she replied indignantly, but she knew that her brother would be useless in this situation, so with an air of inevitability, she hung up.

It wasn’t easy to just walk away from work. Heidi had worked so hard to be who she was, chief designer for her own clothing label. It had brought her immense pride and satisfaction from day one, but two years ago, she’d been spearheaded to design a budget range of clothing for a huge supermarket chain. Everything she ever wanted. Whilst she wasn’t a household name, her clothing was, and as a designer she couldn’t be anything but happy. As each season approached she was inundated with deadlines, and she thrived on it. But typically her mother couldn’t announce this news (not that it had been announced to her formally) when she had just released the latest range. Instead here she was a month before D-day trying to organise every possible outcome of every possible situation so that she could go council her mother and her new fiancé.

Fortunately she had the best assistant in the world, Polly was awesome, she seemed to know what Heidi was thinking before Heidi did – invaluable in business. The next morning her trusted colleague was blasé at the thought of her designer boss being absent.

                “You HAVE to go Heidi, I can handle everything...you’re only ever a Blackberry message away. Honest.”

Heidi paced the room, her shoulder length dark hair masking her frown of concern, “but there are the final fittings...”

                “Which I can do!”

She looked up, “the accessories have to be approved!”

Polly laughed, “I can email you the photos, you can email me back. Anything else?”

Heidi stopped suddenly almost dramatically falling off her high heels in panic, “the factory...”

Grinning Polly patted her on the back, “I called the manager earlier and faxed over the paperwork, they’re waiting on confirmation of the quality of the fabric before they mass produce. It’s all in hand Heidi! This can literally run itself. I swear.”

Heidi flopped in to her seat behind the huge mahogany desk that filled her office. She’d bought the desk before she had the office; it was antique, previously owned by some legendary QC. She’d picked it up at an auction where she’d intended to purchase a rare Singer sewing machine. She lost the machine, but gained THE most awesome desk that she’d ever seen. Not that it was cheap or a bargain...but it made her feel successful. But today she could admit easily that it was more to do with her luck finding Polly than a wooden desk. “You’re a star. I’ve got two days to sort things, I’ll be back for the launch, I promise.”

Within seconds she was tapping into her computer finding a flight.

Unfortunately Heidi’s boyfriend was less enthusiastic. She’d met Casey at a party held by her agent six months earlier; he was a City banker, who loved working and playing hard in equal measure. She fitted snugly into the latter part, her quirky dress sense and curvy figure made her stand out amongst the crowd he associated with, and she knew that her uniqueness made him feel special. They never failed to gain attention, her with her unusual designs; him in his well cut suits. He was over six foot, blonde, and physically very fit. In fact he ticked all the boxes that most women seemed to desire in terms of attractive qualities. But for Heidi there was something missing. But then there was always something missing. She’d yet to find a man that she cared enough about, this time was no different, she had once again fallen into a relationship out of convenience rather than anything more.

She was packing things into a holdall when the doorbell rang that night, opening the door she saw Casey impeccable as ever, scowling down at her.

                “You’re going away? Were you going to even tell me?” he burst past her into the lounge, helping himself to a glass of wine from the bottle on the side table.

She bit back her anger at his over familiarity, “sorry Casey things have crept up on me, this is all a bit last minute.”

                “That’s a reason? You leave me in the dark so that your secretary can tell me gloatingly about you going away instead?”

Heidi stopped turning to square up to him, “A – Polly ISN’T my secretary and B – there was nothing gloating or underhand about it all. You are paranoid. I’ve got a family crisis and it just so happens that my mother lives in Cyprus, hardly the other side of town. Now if you have nothing nicer to say, you can leave that wine and go, I’ll see you when I get back.”

She turned back to the sofa, and the mountain of clothes she’d shortlisted for her trip, after all it was the height of summer, and that meant glorious weather in Cyprus. She couldn’t afford to spend that much time there, but she also didn’t know how long it would take for her to get to grips with the whole situation. As she was folding some of her favourite strappy tops and sundresses, she heard the front door slam, and with a sigh she got on with her packing.

Two days later she was flying first class to Larnaca, continually working on her laptop until they landed four hours later, then she transferred to a taxi that wound down to her mother’s villa in the hills above the town. Heidi couldn’t fight the sadness in coming here. It reminded her of her Dad, this was her first visit since she’d attended his funeral seven months earlier.

Her parents had always travelled, her father had been a freelance nautical engineer, her mother his PA, organising his life. For the whole of her growing life he and her mother had taken short term contracts all over the globe. Heidi and Lucas had attended boarding school, something she’d hated, yet Lucas had loved, which just about summed up their polar opposite personalities. She’d been at the end of her University years when both parents finally retired to Cyprus. They’d visited lots, but it was never enough for her, not really, and within seven years her father was dead.

The short journey from the airport to her mother’s home passed quickly, and all too soon she was sliding out of the car and climbing up the short driveway to the beautiful villa. The pool, groomed gardens and lush sea view were the fodder of real estate brochures, but to her it was somewhere that would never be a home to her.

Barbara Mortimer was a small woman, her hair still naturally dark, her face lightly tanned from the constant sun. She was a hard worker, her father had always joked that she was the driving force behind his success, and since the death of Isaac Mortimer she had been lost. Her emails and occasional calls to Heidi had told her that. So where did this new man fit in? When had the grieving widow morphed into a lover, a fiancée?  Heidi was pondering that thought when she rounded the side of the house and recognised the familiar figure in the distance tending the award winning roses across the other side of the garden, the same roses that had been transferred to seven previous homes of the Mortimer’s.

                “Hello?” She called out.

Heidi smiled as she saw her mother freeze mid-prune as she recognised the voice of her daughter. Looking up the expressive face burst into an animated smile as she bounded across the gardens to embrace her daughter.

                “Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?” she squealed as she pulled her close after briefly holding her at arm’s length. “I could’ve picked you up, taken you for dinner....”

She reciprocated her mother’s embrace, and hugged her tightly, “I miss you Mama, we don’t see each other half as often as we should.”

                “I know,” she held Heidi and examined her closely as she continued, “I never come back to Britain darling, I know that I should visit you and Lucas more. It’s just even though we weren’t there much the last fifteen years,” she sighed, “...too many memories.”

Heidi smiled, “I know, I kind of feel the same about this place.” She looked up at the house. “I see Dad everywhere. That’s why I don’t come here more often.”

Her mother smiled, “we’ve all got our crosses to bear, hey? Look, I’ll cancel my hair appointment tomorrow now that you’re here...there’s so much we could do.”

Heidi shook her head, “don’t be silly, I can relax on the beach, I could do with some chill out time! I’ve got away from the chaos of London.”

Barbara linked arms with her daughter and led her into the house, “so what brings you out here so unexpectedly? Not that I’m not delighted to see you!”

                “I need a hug from my mother?” Heidi looked down at her.

Her mother smiled, “nothing to do with rumours of me getting engaged.”

Heidi sighed, “well there was a little mention of a Greek tycoon!”

With a pot of tea and some cakes, they sat on the veranda looking down to the azure seas of the coast in the distance. And as Barbara poured them a mug each, she smiled at Heidi.

                “It may seem quick darling, but I’m going into this with my eyes open, I promise.”

Heidi nodded, “I just wondered if this was anything to do with me and Lucas not getting out here very often.”

She shook her head, “I love you both and wish we all saw each other more, but I’m not lonely, honestly. I do miss your father every day, and Cesare understands that. He lost his wife a few years ago, she was English too, he misses her in the same way. I’m not looking to replace your father, or move on, I could never do that. We both know that we’ve had the best time with the love of our life, but we want a friend, support, companionship. That’s what we’ve got I promise. You’re in luck as he’s coming over tomorrow. He’s in Paphos on business, but has promised to come here for a day or so after that, he spends a lot of time in Greece.”

She smiled, “ah! So that explains the hair cut. Do I get a chance to vet him?”

Barbara laughed, a high pitched tinkle, “of course. But you’ll love him, I know you will. He’s wonderful!”

As she listened to her love crazed mother, she tried not to hate the stranger for attempting to fill the place of her father so quickly and without her or Lucas being informed.

They shared wine and ate a meal they made together that evening and talked about everything and nothing. It had been too long since they’d sat down together with no one else demanding their time or attention. Namely Lucas.

                “So you’ve got a new range coming out?”

Heidi nodded as she bit into a roast potato, chewing contemplatively, “autumn/winter launches in about four weeks.”

                “Oh Heidi, I’ve dragged you away from that? You should have stayed back home until you were freer.”

                “Nonsense, I pay an assistant to assure me that she can cope in my absence...I should have come sooner really. It shouldn’t have taken this to make me come see you.”

Barbara smiled, leaning back in her chair, “we’ve all held each other at arm’s length since we lost your Dad, haven’t we? Not just you, but me and Lucas too.”

Heidi moved to the fridge and got them another bottle of white wine, “so tell me about Cesare. Where did you meet?” 

You Got It Wrong - Part Forty One (incomplete)

Chapter Forty One

A/N So so so so sorry at the delay. Had a ridiculous January on so many levels. Finally started to get this story sorted and I had a forced absence. Sorry that it's not to everyone's cup of tea, I know how I want this story to go, but it's not getting there as I'd hoped. I will complete it, but my next story is already taking over, and it's a difficult time when I'm trying to formulate the rest of this story as another one is fighting for attention in my small mind!

I hope that you can stick with this, I will edit it, maybe rewrite parts, but I literally post as I write the chapters, so it's hard to go back and change things. Anyway. Sorry to you loyal readers once again. Promise regular updates. And then the next story very soon!

MZ

Lilah was sat in the kitchen on Amelia’s Notting hill house looking pale. Nina stood there staring at her trying desperately to gauge how her friend was felling. She’d been happy when she’d flown off to Cyprus, but then she was never happier than when was modelling. That was her prime love. She hadn’t done it for a long time, and she’d been looking forward to the trip. But something had changed.

                “You ok?”

Lilah looked up her face a mask, “I didn’t hear you come in.”

Nina stepped towards her, “I wasn’t quiet, you know me.” She sat in front of her, “what’s wrong? How was Cyprus?”

She leaned back in her chair, looking at her friend through dark expressionless eyes.

                “Warm...”

She nodded, “and the shoot?”

Lilah nodded, “I delivered...”

                “And you caught up with some old friends?”

Lilah bit her bottom lip, then nodded, “yes.”

At no point did Lilah make eye contact with Nina, so she shuffled to sit in front of her, “Lilah...what is it? What’s happened?”

She watched as Lilah shook her head, then reached for the cold cup of tea in front of is, drinking it without the flinch it probably deserved. And had replaced the mug on the table before she lifted her eyes, “I did it. Four days in the heat...and it was fine.”

                “And?” Nina was on pins.

                “Two nights ago, we wrapped it up, and Leonora, do you remember her?” When Nina nodded, vaguely able to remember the woman she’d modelled with in the past. “Well, she asked me to stay on for a couple of nights...a little winter sun, and of course sample the nightlife; I mean Ayia Napa is quite the place she assured me.” 

Nina smiled, “so I hear.”

                “We were in this nightclub, it was really busy, I mean considering it’s so late in the year. I didn’t drink much...I’m not in the mood these days.”

                “You’ll get your groove back. You were so much stronger when you left...”

                “I collapsed...in the toilets. I was waiting for Leonora to finish up...thank god...”

Nina grabbed her hand, “collapsed? Jesus Lilah what the hell is going on?”

                “I’m pregnant.”

Theo watched Sadie playing with Melody through the one way window of the room in the contact centre. The liaison officer linked to them felt that Sadie was trustworthy and that she should increase her role, see Melody more often and for longer...maybe in another location. He couldn’t think about that. He knew that he’d struggle to cope without the control over his daughter, Sadie could do anything and he couldn’t begin to imagine what it would be like if she disappeared with Melody to somewhere unknown. The night he’d found her with Sadie unconscious still haunted his dreams, and he couldn’t believe that people in authority honestly thought she was ready for more contact. Were they all mad?”

He turned to their liaison, a woman in her fifties called Cheryl, “I can’t agree to it. I want random drug tests first. If she passes a few then, and only then will I think about it. After all she’s a manipulator, and being a woman, the mother you all think she deserves specialist treatment. I mean what man would be treated the same way?”

Cheryl pursed her lips, “Mr Peterson, that isn’t the case, I assure you.”

                “Four months ago that woman...” he nodded in the direction of Sadie, “passed out due to drugs whilst caring for my daughter. She has not had any rehabilitation or detox, and YOU all want her to have MORE involvement with a vulnerable child she’s already proved she is too selfish to look after.”

                “But...”

He held up a hand, “there is NOTHING you can say to change things.” He nodded to the glass, to the tableau playing out in from of them, “so she can spend forty minutes reading stories to Melody, so she can play doctors and nurses. When she leaves here and jacks up on cocaine she’ll forget she was even here. I KNOW her, you forget that. I need detox and negative drug tests. Or I’ll pull even this bit of contact.”

His scowl silenced the woman, he didn’t care that he seemed unreasonable; no one seemed to be looking at the big picture, just Sadie and her doe eyes gaining pity wherever she went. He was getting more and more angry, he needed some fresh air.

“I’m going to wait outside.” The woman almost looked relieved to see him leave, and he gasped at the air as he emerged into the morning as though his life depended on it.

Sadie, he clenched his hands into fists wanting to punch a wall. All her life, all their married life she’d fluttered eyelashes and got what she wanted from Daddy Dearest, from teachers, employers...and him. Now she was using the same tactics to manipulate their daughter’s welfare. Well THIS time he was in a position of power, and she wouldn’t win.

He glanced at his phone and groaned, still no message from Nina, he knew that was part of why he was so angry. She’d disappeared four days ago from his home with no explanation, and other than an “I’ll call you soon” text, he’d heard nothing from her. And he was getting desperate. He had no idea how important she was to him until she disappeared. And it was painful. Especially when everything else was a disaster.

His phone rang and he glanced at the number, then let out a sigh at the fact it wasn’t Nina, instead it was one of his contractors from the new site he was managing in Harlow. He wasn’t calling for fun, there were problems and apparently only he could deal with it. He was waiting on a carer starting work looking after Mansell, and a little part of Melody’s day. They were still working out a schedule where the carers linked in with both him and Daniel so that Mansell was rarely alone. But it relied on nothing going wrong like this. Storming back into the contact centre, he had no choice but to wait the twenty minutes that were left of the visit.

Ninety minutes later, Melody was asleep in her car seat, curled under a blanket and Theo had solved the latest conundrum and the work was back on target. As he climbed into the driver’s seat of his truck he sighed, this was no life for Melody. And it was no life for him. Not really.

Picking up his phone he called Nina, he’d promised her space, time. But he needed to hear her voice.

But it cut to answer phone.

                “Nina. I’m sorry, I must sound like a stalker...but I miss you. I wanted to hear your voice.” He paused, “I hope things are ok. I...call me?”

He hung up the call and tossed the phone onto the seat beside him with a groan. When did things deteriorate so badly?

Nina looked at Lilah. She was finally asleep. But even in slumber she looked troubled. They’d had a tough few days, but hopefully they had turned the corner. Lilah had been silent for a long time, not answering Nina’s questions, but now, three days and a trip to the South of France later, she was talking. In a small chalet just off the Med coast, they’d spent two days not doing anything. But earlier that day she’d cornered her friend.

                “This is happening. You have to deal with it. You have to decide what you want to do.”

Lilah had rolled her head from her resting position comatose on the sofa to stare at Nina, “really?”

Nina squatted beside her, “Lilah, you are almost ten weeks pregnant. In thirty weeks, just over half a year...it’ll be here in your arms. You HAVE to wake up to this darling, as much as I don’t want to hurt you; you have got to be realistic. Do you want to have it? You’ve always wanted kids.”

And it was then that she started to cry, loud racking sobs that broke Nina’s heart, “I wanted them with someone who loved me, I wanted family, love...future. How can I love a baby whose father...” she shook her head. “I can’t even think about it. I can’t even verbalise it. How can I look this child in the eye, knowing what I know? Knowing how it came to exist.” She sighed, “I hate him, that man, I hate what happened. How can I treat a baby resulting from that well? I’ll blame it, resent it.”

Nina sat back on her heels, just relieved to know that Lilah had been thinking about things. Silence in this case was because she was trying to work through what was happening in her head. That was a positive. Definitely a move forward.

                “Will you go talk to someone? A counsellor? Someone?”

She shook her head, “not a stranger. I can’t do that.”

Nina had groaned at that, but then took her hand, “if we go away, somewhere away from here, somewhere different. And talk to me. We have to work out what you’re going to do.”

Lilah looked concerned so she added, “you can’t pretend it isn’t happening. You know that darling?”

And it was then the tear started to fall. It was what she needed, Nina held her, knowing that as each tear fell they were taking another step in the right direction.

Within a few days they were away, on the edge of the French Riviera in a small beach front chalet, filling their days with walks on the beach, good food, and copious amounts of herbal tea. Each day saw Lilah’s mood change. One day she wanted the baby, it was everything she wanted, everything she’d ever wanted. The next it was hell, her idea of permanent torture and torment, a real life reminder of what happened. Nina could understand both sides and she knew she’d be no better trying to make a decision over that.  But with every day, they were talking more, Lilah was opening up, and Nina knew that was all they could hope for.

                “I’ll speak to a counsellor. You’re right Nina; I can’t keep putting you through this.”

Nina opened her eyes, she’d fallen asleep in the sun kissed lounge, with the windows closed against the cold winter wind, but the heating on, it was more than warm sat there. She looked across at her friend who had been asleep directly opposite her. Lilah was so beautiful, her long lithe body curled up with the elegance of a cat, and her long blonde hair wafting around her shoulders, so serene in her repose.

                “Really? What brought that on?”

Lilah smiled, “you’ve got a life, a fit man waiting patiently for you. I’m compromising everything, being a selfish bitch.”

Nina stretched, “you’re never that. We’re sisters really, you know that.”

Lilah grinned, “well it’s my turn to go get dinner, I was fancying some pizza from that shack down the road?”

Nina nodded, “could get some more vino at the same time?”

                “Amazing idea. Maybe you want to...I don’t know...make a couple of calls, catch up on life whilst I’m gone?”

As Lilah pulled on her jacket and woolly hat, reached for her purse, Nina looked at her phone; she’d barely contacted Theo since leaving abruptly ten days ago. She had text him, but not much. But then she figured he was a big boy, he had to learn to cope without her, as she was a loyal friend.

As Lilah left, giving a wave, Nina reached for the phone and dialled the man who’d not been far from her thoughts the whole time they’d been away.

Margaret, Mansell’s carer was driving Theo mad, she literally changed everything, and suddenly the world revolved around their plans. Not that Mansell was complaining, and not that he himself was grossly unhappy with it all. But when he asked for things to be done, or when there were important appointments, things that Mansell had to do, Margaret took him to the park, or to the shops...anywhere and anything bar what they were meant to be doing. He wondered if it was the woman pushing the boundaries, staking her place in the whole picture, or whether this was Mansell himself causing chaos. That would be about right, the man was starting to get the sparkle back in his eyes, and that had to be a good sign.

Today he was stuck across town, late for picking up his daughter, and looking likely to miss the pharmacy where Mansell’s prescription was waiting to be picked up...in the next forty minutes.

Melody was most important, but his grandfather needed the meds. And he’d called Margaret fourteen times in the last hour to see if she could collect the prescription. But she hadn’t answered. As he grunted and kicked his truck into gear to do as much as he could in the time he had, the phone finally started to ring.

Connecting it through his hands free kit, he barked, “where the hell have you been? I’ve been calling you ALL afternoon!”

Bracing himself for the reaction of Margaret that he’d already come to expect, he half flinched, and nothing prepared him for the voice that offered, “really? I hadn’t noticed, and I’m in the South of France if you must know.” Then she laughed.

Theo almost stopped the vehicle to check that the voice was real. “Nina, is that you? Where the bloody hell have YOU been too?”

You Got It Wrong - Part Forty

Chapter Forty

Sorry, hit a brick wall with this story, was about to abandon it...never done that before, but think I may have salvaged it. Hope so. Sorry for the delay, x

Lilah was sunning it up in Cyprus, Theo was busy working. Nina groaned, she’d never been lonely in her life before, but suddenly she was. So she set off to visit Mansell, he’d appreciate her company, and maybe stop her from going insane. And on the flipside she might stop him from going mad too.

He was sat outside, it was a cold day, but there were a few chairs set out overlooking the sea view. He smiled as she approached, “Nina! How great to see you!”

                “You look a little more chipper than the last time I saw you!”

He grinned, “and I hear that is due to you...that it was your idea.”

She looked at him quizzically, “me?”

                “I’m moving to London tomorrow. To live with Theo and Melody, he told me you suggested that.”

She shook her head, “no, I told him that he and Daniel needed to pull their fingers out and start looking after you. That’s all.” She accompanied the words with an elaborate wink, and that made him laugh out loud.

                “Ahh, a woman’s gentle pressure?”

Nina sat beside him and laughed too, “something like that. So you excited?”

He nodded, “I haven’t been to London in ages...I want to try and go to the National History museum, not sure I’ll manage it, but just being back in the City will make me happy.” He looked out over the sea at a ship chugging along on the horizon, “I know that I’m going because I can’t live alone...”

She covered a hand with hers and gave it a squeeze, “don’t beat yourself up over THAT. You’ve given those boys everything, from what I can see, about time they gave something back.”

                “They’ve got someone to look after me, from an agency. I think they think I can’t wipe my own backside!”

                “They want you to be safe...that’s all.”

He pulled himself to his feet, “I suppose that’s true. Now I have to go change, did I tell you Hélène is coming to visit? My granddaughter...” he stumbled over the words, then looked up with a sad smile, “she’s bringing her to see me.”

                “Wow, that’ll be amazing.”

He nodded, “it’s a long time since I saw her...though don’t know what she’ll make of this.” He threw his less active arm out in front of him and she sighed.

                “She loves YOU, she won’t care if you’ve got NO arms, ok?”

He sighed, “this bloody happens JUST when I’m starting to get to know her again.”

                “Well, you can’t help that, but think how much more appealing visiting you in London will be compared to Brighton!”

That made him smile, “you’ll visit me too? Not just Theo?”

Grinning she patted him on the back, “you try keeping me away!”

As she was leaving the centre, a black cab pulled up almost in front of her, and out stepped the regal looking Hélène, and her face broke into a smile, “how wonderful to see you again Nina. You look well.”

Claudine stepped out next and smiled too.

                “I could say the same to you Hélène; I only hope Mansell’s blood pressure is up to it!”

It was a poorly timed joke in view of his fairly recent stroke and the three grimaced a little awkwardly, “sorry, that was...”

The two delicate French women chuckled, and Claudine added, “once they get old...” she nodded in her grandmother’s direction, “then even mentioning the weather can have a double meaning.”

Hélène swatted at her arm playfully, “the cheek of today’s youth! How is Mansell? He seemed sad on the phone two days ago.”

                “He’s much better, but I’ll leave him to tell you all that’s happening. It was good to see you again.”

The two women smiled, then moved towards the rehab centre that housed Mansell.

                “Come to London?” She’d barely got back to the house when her phone rang. Theo didn’t introduce himself, just demanded that of her.

She grinned, “what’s it worth?”

A laugh came down the phone line, “dinner...a movie...and all the pleasure you can cope with!”

She should be angry at the lack of finesse, but the desperation, the promises all made her tingle from head to foot. “Mmm, as tempting as that is, I really have to wash my hair tonight!”

That made him laugh again, “how about I throw in a foot massage?”

                “Oooh, I’m so easy to please. How come you’re free?”

She could hear him relax as he replied, “well, I’m almost moved into Dan’s house...and he’s taking Melody to pick a new duvet and curtains for her bedroom...he felt maybe I needed a break?”

She smiled, even though he couldn’t see that. “I saw Mansell earlier; he’s really excited to move in.”

Theo sighed, “it’s not ready for him really, we have to do a lot of cosmetics, but I’ve got some of the boys in on the weekend. Hopefully get him up here after that. Longer than he’s hoping, but it’s the only way.”

                “Sounds like you’ve got it all sorted.”

                “Yep, all bar who I want to spend the rest of the day with.”

Nina looked up at the click, three o’clock. “There’s a train in about forty minutes.”

                “Can you make that?”

She laughed, “I am never going to need four hours of pampering before I can leave the house. Where shall I meet you?”

                “I can pick you up.”

                “Don’t worry, meet me at Victoria. I’ll be there in an hour and a half...”

                “Can’t wait. Decide where you want to eat. Ok?”

Giggling she loudly pondered for a moment, “mmm, wonder where I can get you to part with the most of your money...let me think on that.”

Theo hugged Daniel; he’d been the greatest brother the last few months. Having a night without Melody, having the chance to spend time with Nina made him content. He loved his daughter to distraction, but the thought of some grown up time was priceless.

                “You are taking Mansell on, full time. How the hell can I begrudge you a night with your girl? And,” he ruffled the hair of Melody stood beside him, “I get chance to spend the evening with MY girl, what do you say?”

 She held her arms up to him, and he scooped her up in a hug, “now give Dad a big hug, cos we have some SERIOUS shopping to do. You ready?”

Melody was nodding enthusiastically as she hugged her father, then clutching her overnight bah, she disappeared with a wave.

An hour later he was sat next to Nina in a pub in the centre of town, beers in front of them, debating what restaurant to eat in, and how long they could manage to avoid rushing back to his to be truly alone.

The next few days were hectic for Theo and he had little chance to see Nina, but he over saw conversions, painting, furniture removal...the lot. And Sunday afternoon saw him and Melody heading to Brighton to collect Mansell. On the way there after several songs sung at full volume, mainly of the Frozen variety, Melody fell asleep. So Theo called Nina.

                “On our way to the coast. Can we meet for a quick lunch?”

He heard Nina chuckle “is today the day then? I bet Mansell is ecstatic.”

                “He’s called me fourteen times this morning all ready!”

She laughed, “lunch sounds amazing. How about the Sea View Cafe? It’s walking distance of Mansell’s rehab centre; I can collect him and meet you there.”

He closed his eyes for a moment, a dangerous thing whilst driving on the motorway, but he loved how she included his grandfather, she didn’t expect to dominate his time and attention. She was perfect.

                “Brilliant. We’re forty minutes away.”

After a lovely lunch and supervising the removal of Mansell’s things from Oakdale, they hit the motorway back to London, and within an hour both Mansell and Melody were both fast asleep.

                “So what have you got to do when we get back?”

He manoeuvred the car through the heavy traffic for a moment, then glanced at her, “settle Mansell in, settle Melody in...then maybe make you dinner? Will you eat with us?”

She nodded, “sounds nice, I can get the late train home.”

HE shook his head, “stay. I have a spare room now...for propriety’s sake.”

Pondering that for a moment, her silence caused him to look at her, “you will?”

She nodded, “just on this one occasion.”

Grinning he reached out and put his hand on her thigh, “I have to blur the lines a bit.  You ok with that?”

                “Melody’s got a mother, I’ll never be that.”

He nodded, “I’m not expecting you to be anything like that...but I am struggling to keep you both separate. Does that bother you?”

She sighed, “she’s a lovely girl, but I worry that it’s an added pressure...it’s hard enough when there’s just two of us...”

                “I promise that it won’t change things, I promise.”

Nina turned to him with a grin, “you’d promise anything to get your own way!”

Melody was a delight and DID make things easier, particularly for Mansell who had to deal with the reality that stairs into the house, and the layout of the house made his mobility an issue. For a proud man, that was so obviously difficult until Melody in her sing song voice took over. He made it to his bedroom holding her hand and feeding gratefully on her enthusiasm, it broke Theo’s heart to see the independent and strong man looking so weak and vulnerable.

                “What do you want for dinner then old man? Whatever you want...”

Mansell was testing out the new armchair, and looked up with a smile, “anything Theo. I’m just SO glad to be out of that bloody hospital!”

Nina moved to look into the room over Theo’s shoulder, “you are NEVER so laid back over food, I remember your demands when we went to Normandy!”

They all paused for a moment as they remembered that trip for very different reasons; it had seen Nina became part of Mansell’s life, through her actions, but then part of Theo’s too.

“Six months, what a turn around, hey?” Mansell looked between the two of them poignantly, then said, “steak, chips and pepper sauce.”

Nina elbowed Theo in the ribs, knowing he’d have to make a trip to the supermarket for that and giggled, “well why don’t I get us a drink, while you play hunter and go get us some steak?”

Poking out his tongue he found Melody in the lounge, “you want to come to the supermarket with me?”

She wasn’t convinced, and when Nina entered the room, she looked up and smiled, “can we make biscuits?”

It was now Theo’s turn to laugh, knowing it was the last thing that Nina wanted to do.

                “Not got the ingredients, how about...we watch Nick Junior? You can tell me ALL about your favourite shows. Sound good?”

Melody beamed then skipped off to the lounge, and Nina turned to Theo, “some of us got it, some haven’t. Hope it’s stopped raining.”

He was still grinning from her cheek when he climbed into his car.

A couple of hours later he had delivered. They had eaten the greatest steaks she’d ever tasted, Melody was having a bedtime story, Mansell was in his room watching a movie. Nina had kicked her legs up on the sofa, glad for the time alone. But the calm and serenity of the evening, was disturbed by her phone ringing. Reaching for it she saw Lilah’s name and smiled, she hadn’t called from Cyprus.

                “LILAH! How was the sun?”

But she was met with silence. Eventually she spoke, “I’m at Amelie’s house. Can you meet me there? Please. I wouldn’t ask...” The silence that followed was only punctuated by a sob, and Nina was suddenly scared all over again.

She was pulling on her boots when Theo came downstairs, barefoot, relaxed, beautiful.

                “What’s wrong? Where are you going?”

She shrugged, “I’m not sure, Lilah’s back from Cyprus...she needs me.”

Nina knew she couldn’t reveal much, it wasn’t her story to tell, so instead she offered an apologetic smile.

                “Will you be back?”

Again she shrugged, “I don’t know. Don’t hate me, please?”

                “I don’t hate you...I’m just disappointed.”

Smiling she reached up to cup his cheek, “I’ll make it up to you.” Then after a brief kiss she headed out into the rain.