What about you? - 5

Chapter 5

Three weeks had passed since Kate had fled to her mother, proverbial tail between her legs. Her mother had been both amazed and ecstatic to see her. After the greatest breakfast Kate had curled up in front of the fire and slept like a baby. When she’d woken her whole perspective had changed and she was depressed on so many levels. She’d left early afternoon and turned up at Tilly’s as planned, but her low mood continued through dinner.

Her housemates Mike and Steve were on fine comedic form as usual so she was able to hide behind them. It was only when Ashton, Tilly’s fiancé took the boys down into his newly converted ‘man cave’ cellar that Tilly had turned to her.

                “So what happened? Were the family oppressive and hinting that you’re doing everything wrong?” Tilly was the only person who knew the truth, knew the real Kate, she’d been beside her through everything, and even though Tilly disagreed with the choices she made, Kate knew she had her complete support.

She shrugged trying to avoid the tears that had threatened to fall since she’d woken at her mother’s. She’d done sadness and grief to the max, but most of all she felt extreme guilt. She’d promised herself six years ago that she’d stay true to Peter. Everyone thought she was mad, but it was what she HAD to do, and now she’d sullied that. How could she look herself in the mirror?

                “I met a man...” she finally offered, “and...”

Tilly rushed over to her and pulled her into her arms, “don’t beat yourself up, you hear me? You’ve devoted far too much time to the past; this is not a bad thing!”

Kate shook her head, “nothing has changed Tilly, I’m still Peter’s...but I’ve now got even more guilt to manage. I ruined what little self respect that I had!”

                “When are you going to stop blaming yourself for what happened to Peter? It wasn’t your fault! You don’t deserve this!” Instead of shouting Tilly’s voice was quiet, controlled. But this wasn’t a new conversation and she knew that a full on slanging match never got a desired outcome.

                “You weren’t there! I saw him drive away, I could’ve stopped him, done so many things, and then...”

Tilly held up a hand to silence her, “let’s not rehash old ground. Tell me about the man that’s managed to penetrate the now infamous Michaels resolve! I’ve not known you strike up a conversation with a man in years, let alone ‘meet’ one. So...SPILL!”

Kate shrugged, “he’s a friend of the bride’s brother, he was there alone, and he kind of pursued me all night...”

                “And you didn’t hit him?” Whilst she joked, Tilly realised the seriousness of this revelation. And as she moved to the large modern fridge to retrieve more wine she almost fainted...or dropped the bottle...or both.

                “I slept with him, and now I hate myself. What am I going to do?”

As Kate stifled a sob, Tilly turned gobsmacked, open mouthed, well and truly stunned. Seeing the obvious torment and distress on her friend’s face, she rushed over to once again wrap her arms around Kate.

                “I think you have to think about the reality of it all and maybe do it again?” that answer was met with a pain filled sob that cut Tilly to the core. “Look, you’ve never wanted anyone else, maybe this is a sign that you’re finally ready to date again. Was he nice? Hell he must’ve been!” She answered her own question, “You’re not likely to be swayed by anyone less than devastating!”

 Kate shrugged, “he lives away, I won’t see him again. But now I have to face up to what I’ve done. And I don’t know how to start!”

               

Tilly stroked her hair, tucking her head into her shoulder and sighed, “I think you should start by admitting you’re only human, and like everyone else you’re not perfect. You feel you’ve let down yourself, what you had in the past. But you haven’t, you’re just normal! And that’s why I love you! Why we all do! Now wipe your tears and get this wine down your throat! And for God’s sake LIVE A LITTLE!”

Kate groaned dropping her head to her desk. That weekend was still so vivid in her mind, today it had been fired by an idea for the advertising campaign she was working on. A new Polish vodka, the advertising was looking to be a ‘Simple Over Ice’ slogan...and the last time she’d had one it’d been bought by Mason.

Sighing she sat back up and looked at her desk planner, tonight was her only free evening of the week and she was looking forward to a hot bath, and a long soak. She’s bought fresh pasta at lunchtime and a carton of fresh arrabiata sauce from her favourite little Italian deli. With the Chianti she knew was in the wine rack, she needed only to breathe once she got home.

As she was packing up to leave her phone rang and she groaned at the sound of her boss needing a ‘latest update’, just as she was about to go home! A further hour later, and after a trip up to the management suite, she was at last pulling on her coat and heading out to into the dull, dark and damp evening.

Kate had taken less than a dozen steps along the street in the direction of the nearest tube station when a voice, so unexpected, so out of place, floored her.

                “Wow! Do you have any idea how difficult you are to locate?”

Before she turned she knew who’d be standing in front of her, and she didn’t know how that made her feel...other than weak kneed, faint and most definitely sick!

Mason took a long moment to drink in the vision of Kate. She looked so different in her sensible trouser suit, business heals and long double breasted rain coat, hair tied neatly out of her eyes. But she had the same flare of passion, and probably anger as she looked down that elegant nose at him that he almost laughed out loud. Not a wise move at this delicate stage.

                “But now I’ve found you, I have to say you look well!” And she did look well. Since the moment he’d woken to an empty bed, ruing the fact he’d actually fallen asleep, he’d wanted to see her again. For some reason she’d haunted his dreams, both day and night, though in them all, she was a faceless brunette with long elegant curves and perfect breasts. Now that he had her face in front of him, he tried to etch her features into his memory, but knew that she was too complex to recall so easily. “And I’ll warn you, I have a LOT of questions!”

Kate was furious and angry, she felt like a deer caught in a hunter’s trap and the innate fight in her came out, but as she turned on him with all that emotion about to spill out, she realised that she was also very excited, though she loathed that admission. His eyes were wide, those cold icy blue irises that had been so dark and warm when he’d made love to her were now analysing her response. Shaking her head she re-harnessed all that anger and added his pain over her treatment of him to the already huge pile of guilt that was her daily burden.

                “I don’t owe you anything, let alone an explanation.”

He shook his head and reached for her as she made to turn away, “Kate? You ran away...”

Ignoring the sensation, the awareness of his hand touching hers, she glared up at him, “I left as I was expected elsewhere.”

                “Do you have any idea how awful it was to wake up to an empty bed? No note, no phone number...NOTHING!”

She flinched as he raised his voice, not through fear, but she didn’t want to draw attention to herself, she was outside her office, her colleagues would be leaving as she had been. “Look Mason, it was fun, it’s ended. I thought you were living in Dubai?” It was a struggle to sound so controlled, so hard when she really wanted to curl up and cry.

His face contorted into an angry mask, “that would suit you down to the ground, wouldn’t it? For me to disappear to another continent? What was I? A convenience? Someone to use because you had an itch that needed a scratch?”

She shrugged, “I warned you enough times that it couldn’t happen. That it was wrong.”

                “I don’t do one night stands Kate, and at thirty two I’m too old to change. So you can’t walk away.” When he spotted her looking around nervously, he suddenly spotted her weak spot. She was embarrassed. He’d noticed that everyone coming out of the waterfront office block were dressed in the same executive manner as her, she obviously had a high-flying job, and his appearance, this upset was scaring her, not that she was fearful of him, but more likely the embarrassment of people witnessing this public airing of dirty laundry. “Meet me later, for dinner?”

She shook her head, “I have nothing to say Mason.”

Leaning closer, he whispered a response, “you sure about that? I can be here every day until you listen to me, I can shout, scream...you won’t get away from me. All I want is an hour of your time. Tonight. It’s not like I’m asking for the Earth.”

Mason could see the deliberation in her eyes, then was rewarded by a brief nod; she then named a chain restaurant in the centre of London and disappeared from view.  Mason leaned back against the building and sighed, why the hell was this woman always making him act like some sort of caveman? He’d resorted to blackmail on two separate occasions, and that just wasn’t him. Regardless, he had an hour later to change her mind, and he knew that she would not give a minute more!

After diving into the closest tube station Kate made her journey home all the time her mind racing, her main concern was whether or not she could manage an hour of his time without succumbing to what the inner Kate really wanted. Mike and Steve were playing the Xbox when she got to the house. Lots of shouts and noise echoed around the house as was usual when spending time with them.

                “A’Right?” Steve grunted as Mike groaned a defeatist sound, another common trait of the house.

She nodded, but knew that she was too fraught to get involved in any conversations, “yeah, I’m fine. I’ve got to go back out, so I’m just going to dive in the shower.”

Both grunted acknowledgement then returned to their game, some form of armed combat.

Under the hot needles of the shower, Kate was still preoccupied. All thought s were of seeing Mason again, seeing him and talking to him. As much as she tried to convince herself that she hated him, she knew that the real problem was that she had no idea how she’d react to him, her behaviour at her brother’s wedding had stunned her, it was so out of character that she realised she had become scared of herself. Sighing she thrust her face into the aggressive forceful shower and allowed it to pound her thoughts away.

What to wear on such a bizarre occasion. Kate had spent ages staring at the rack of clothes inside her wardrobe and finally chosen a black dress, she didn’t want to appear that she’d made an effort, but on the other hand she wanted to look good, so she paired the dress with chunky ankle boots and some ethnic jewellery. She knew it flattered her figure and that she looked good, but leaving her hair down, a little wild, and the accessories really dressed down the outfit. Smiling at her reflection in the darkened window of the tube she knew she’d made the right choice.

Mason sat in the ridiculously busy restaurant that was only one step up from a fast food joint and shook his head, this was a deliberate ploy by Kate, she chosen somewhere busy, impersonal and the least likely location for a deep and meaningful conversation. The cow!

Spotting her stroll along the dark street towards him, Mason stood and made for the door, meeting her there.

                “You may think that this is funny, but there is no way we’re having food here. It’s close to bedlam!”

Taking her elbow before she could protest, he turned her and directed her by the elbow across the road to another slightly quieter looking pub. It was dark inside, but Mason could make out a table towards the back of the room and lead her that way.

As Kate took in the quiet almost seductive ambience in the room, she started to panic. How the hell could she resist this? Him?

What about you? - 4

Chapter 4

Kate stopped dead as she stepped into the hotel. It was like being in some time warp. Everything was as it was five minutes earlier, yet her heart was still racing, her lips still bruised, and her world turned on its head. Her mother waved and she crossed to her, aware that she probably had mud, if not grass stains across her backside...she half laughed at the thought that it would only improve the look of the dress. Her worry was that everyone would jump to the wrong conclusions. Strolling across the room, she was glad of the dim light to hide her indiscretion.

                “You having fun?” her mother asked, Kate felt herself blush at the innocent question. “You missed your brother leaving! They look so happy!”

Kate squeezed her mother’s hand, there was always so much unsaid between them. “Have you had a great day? There’s been so much planning for you!”

Her mother nodded, “it was worth it. I just wish...” She let the comment fall away instead adding, “I wish I had more children to marry off if it means I get time to spend with you.”

Kate sighed, “I’ll try to get home more often...it’s just hard.”

As usual their conversations ended with pain and awkwardness, but Kate maintained the contact between their hands as they both talked to Aunt Hilda.

                “I’m going to bed now Elaine, Kate. I’ve had a wonderful day, but too much of what the barman called mimosa...I thought it was fruit juice...but I feel too wonky for that!”

The mother and daughter laughed at the eccentric aunty, she was a real law unto herself.

                “Mimosa is buck’s fizz Aunty, you’ve been drinking fizz all day!”

She blushed, “will you see me to my room Kate? I think I probably drank a whole bottle of the stuff!”

Kate was still chuckling as she closed the door behind the tipsy elderly relative, then made for the party. She was ready for bed herself, but she needed to speak to her mother, kiss her goodnight, arrange to see her in the morning.  Her mother was returning to the farm as she hated to leave it without Stuart being there, plus the workers would be in as usual at five am.

Descending the stairs, she was never more aware of her muddy shoes as the reception was well lit, but cutting across to the ballroom she held her head high. People were starting to leave thick and fast, so Kate who’d managed to avoid conversations all day was pinned down by relatives who wanted more from her. She took it in her stride until she spotted the dark figure leaning against the wall opposite, features occluded by the dim lights, but it could only be one person...Mason.

Dropping her head she listened to the ruminations of her Uncle and Aunt who were just about to leave. But it was like standing in the headlights of a racing car, speeding towards her at a ridiculous speed, and she couldn’t switch off to the threat. And he watched her every move.

Whilst her head screamed ‘run away’, she found is attention flattering, more than flattering, it was arousing, and she knew that she was playing up to his attention. From the way she swiped the hair behind her ears, to the coquettish way she tilted her head as she listened to stories of her childhood, and each time she swept her tongue over her bottom lips invitingly, she knew she was trying to tease him, and the look in his eyes told her it was working. She had no idea what game she was playing, after all she’d just run away from him when the image of Peter and her betrayal flashed into her mind. Now she was trying to push his buttons, to turn him on, but she wasn’t sure how she’d deal with the consequences.

Mason had had enough of this teasing, this unrelenting flirting. Any other woman and he’d have marched across the room, tossed her over his shoulder, then carried her cavemen style to his bedroom. But the little he knew about her, he knew that would be the worst thing to do. So he plotted a more amicable conclusion.

He was loitering at the first floor lobby when he heard footsteps on the stairs. He’d been false-alarmed by several other residents climbing the stairs, but this time he was rewarded with Kate. She cut a lonely figure, sat and dejected. He suddenly realised how much front she’d put on through the day. Now she was exhausted.

Kate looked up and saw Mason, he was so sexy, so handsome, but it was the worst moment for her, if one more person had landed misplaced sympathy and pity on her she was likely to explode. She’d escaped to collapse into a ball of self pity and grief, and as she looked at Mason’s face she realised she was too far gone to drag herself back from it.

                “I can’t do this Mason...”

He reached out and laid a hand on her shoulder, “do what? I’m just trying to see what there is between us Kate, and to be honest you’ve been flirting with me most of the day.”

She shrugged, “flirting is just that. I’m tired...”

His restraint to her shoulder was gentle but insistent, “what are you scared of? We’re two consenting adults out for some fun. What’s wrong with that?”

                “It’s not what I want!” She exclaimed close to tears, so please leave me alone.

Mason didn’t believe her, but he was a gentleman if nothing else, so he lowered his mouth to hers just for a brief kiss, a goodbye. But she latched onto his lips with her own in an outpouring of emotion and desire, and, he was only human. Wrapping his arms around her, he reciprocated, devouring her eagerly.

                “Where’s your room?” he breathed against her neck between nibbles at her earlobe.

                “Fourth floor,” she offered, suddenly realising they could so easily be discovered kissing so brazenly in the corridor.

Mason groaned a response, “too far, mine is along the hall.” Taking her hands he led her there never letting his lips leave hers, other than to open the door.  And if she regretted her choice, it was only for a second. Inside the closed room, he backed her against the door and continued where he’d left off, devouring her neck, nudging the fabric of the dress away from her shoulder.

Kate started to panic, how had she got here? And why couldn’t she seem to break this spell Mason had over her? He’d sensed her tension, she could tell, because the torment he was creating at the base of her neck eased as he brought his mouth back to find hers.  

He was an expert kisser, and it melted the ice at the core of her heart with heat and fire. Within seconds again she was more than pliant in his arms; she was alive, reciprocating every nuance, every step up in intensity. Whatever regrets or misgivings she had that weren’t washed away by the alcohol consumed earlier and the emotions of the day, dissolved in a wave of passion, desire and lust.

Mason finally found the zip underneath her right arm that would release that awful dress once and for all. He didn’t pause, merely tugged at it. Lifting his head from hers he slid the sleeves over her arms and was rewarded by the satin creation falling to her hips and then with a rather erotic wiggle to the floor. All that he’d imagined was there for him to see, delicious curves from a slim waist to rounded hips, breasts that were barely contained by the flesh coloured bra that remained, and as he looked he realised his hands wouldn’t do a better job.

Two hands at his throat distracted him from the appraisal of the woman stood in front of him. Mason let out a groan as his tie was loosened, his jacket pushed over his arms.

Kate didn’t feel self conscious virtually naked in front of this stranger, instead she was desperate to see him, to feel and taste him. He was solid muscle from his divine shoulders to his defined Pecs and the hint of a six pack, and as a rare treat he was taller than her, by a long way. 

She watched his long fingers trail from her neck down her arms to her waist, then they slid up to circle her ribs, just below her bra. When a thumb reached out and found the hard nipple protruding through the lace, she jolted her head up to stare at him wide eyed.

With a wicked smile he dropped his head to find the hard point with his mouth latching his lips on through the lace. Kate’s knees felt weak, and as her knees buckled he lowered her down to the bed with a chuckle.

She didn’t drop her eyes from him as he unbuckled his trousers and let them fall to the floor, in just his tight hugging boxer shorts; he climbed on to the bed next to her. Again she admired that beautiful body, a dark spattering of chest hair narrowed to a thin track heading down to those shorts, and suddenly she was impatient to see all of him, but as she reached out, he took both her hands in one of his and lifted them to the pillow above her head.

From that position he could unpin Kate’s hair, slowly and completely until the dark curls fanned out over the pillows.

                “Has anyone ever told you JUST how beautiful you are?”

She sighed, biting her lip with nervousness, a gesture that drove him absolutely wild. Kissing her again all conversation, all humour was suddenly gone, Mason released her hands, reaching behind her to release the catch on her bra, then lifted the lace away to finally view the beautiful breasts that had tormented him all day. He spent a moment just staring at them before once again capturing a peak in with his lips, this time nothing got in the way and it felt like heaven.

Within seconds they’d somehow managed to pull of their own or each other’s underwear...it all became a blur, then there was a desperate attempt to touch and taste every inch of each other, but their desire was too great, they were both too impatient. So Mason hovered over her his hard naked body pressed seductively against hers.  Wriggling her hips she accommodated his, throwing back her head, she gave him access to her neck. Within seconds he was in her and the battle that had started in the gardens earlier continued until they both reached the pinnacle of their lust, their desire and passion in a haze of exquisite pleasure.

Mason was slumped over Kate, still inside her, still engulfed in the four long limbs wrapped around him.  His head was down, eyes closed, and his rapid heart and laboured breathing were both thundering in his ears. He’d never felt so desperate for someone, and never had such an explosive, earth shattering consequence in his life before.  This was something, someone special and he had a sense of belonging that he’d lost after his University life. With a sigh, he pulled out of her and rolled to her side.

Groaning she tried to tease the life back into her cramped limbs, Kate started to feel the familiar pangs of guilt, fear, pain rise like a hot acid in her stomach. She didn’t and couldn’t deny that the last half an hour had been wonderful, better than, but there was the harsh cold reality waiting for her when she returned home. She had no idea how she’d front this out, get over it.

As half of her wanted to flit, in what she knew was typical Kate Michaels style, the heavy arm of Mason strewn across her stomach, and the warm lips teasing her earlobe even now were keeping her here. Her desire her need for him overtaking her need for self preservation. Something she knew she’d spend a long time ruing, but now the oppressed reckless part of her sighed ‘in for a penny in for a pound’.

She waited for him to fall asleep. The heavy breathing preceded his whole body relaxing and it too got heavier against her body. And with that she knew he was finally there. Sliding out of bed, she searched for her underwear, not finding more than her bra, she slid into the dress she never thought she’d wear again, reached for her small purse and shoes then made for the door.

From there she looked back at Mason, his dark hair covering his eyes, the sheet barely covering his beautiful body, a body she now knew more intimately than her own, and sighed with regret that she’d not get the chance to share it again. Then closing the door she ran up the stairs, ignoring the aches in so many parts of her body, to the sanctity of her own room.

In half an hour she was dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, packed up, and checking out of her room. The receptionist looked stunned that she was leaving at five am, but she needed to run, and her mother lived far enough away to be a safe haven. And she knew she’d be welcome there at any time.

Quick thank you!!

Thanks all once again for your avid readership! I love your comments too! This site is getting 6500 hits a month now which is really flattering and I appreciate every one of you!

Few quick comment replies, and I know there are still a lot of questions, I'm getting there. Promise!


Annie - Thanks, you're first for most chapters, love that!! And yep all will hopefully be revealed!


Anon - cute? I HOPE so!!


Tiffany - That's another great comment, and so good to know! Thanks for commenting!!


Lively - :) So pleased to hear from you, and hope this story does offer a little breath of fresh air...


Mads - it's only been a day and a half:) but have got this chapter out anyway! Like that you're that desperate! 

What about you? - 3

Chapter 3

Kate walked rather inelegantly to the middle of the dance floor, then stood there waiting for him, aggression being the name of the game, the man, whose name she still didn’t know, was smiling as he strolled purposefully towards her, his eyes watching her with humour.

When he finally reached her, he slid his arms around her pulling her close. Kate suddenly felt like she was drowning. He smelt divine, a light musky aftershave she couldn’t identify, and being tall her eyes were level with his mouth, those delicious plump lips that were a temptation all of their own.  Trying to swallow the lump in her throat, she dropped her head to look at the dark pinstripe lapel of his expensive looking suit, anything but his beautiful features and those all seeing eyes.

The band had been playing swing and soft jazz all evening, and as they sang ‘It Had to Be You’, she had to tolerate this man’s husky singing close to her ear. It was pure torture.

                “So why does dancing with a man you can barely look in the eye please your mother?” He finally broke the sexually charged intense atmosphere.

Kate didn’t answer, nor did she lift her eyes, until she asked him, “Who are you?”

The man’s mouth broke into a grin, “not sure I should tell you, I quite like being the anonymous stranger!” When she scowled, he offered, “I’m a friend of Brandon, Paula’s brother. He couldn’t make it, his wife is due to have a baby any second, but he asked me to come as I was in the country anyway. Kind of like representing him by proxy.”

                “You live in Dubai too?” she could hear the hope in her own voice and he laughed before replying. “I do, for most of the time.”

Safe. Distant, she’d never see him again were the three thoughts that echoed around her head. Letting him waltz them around the floor, she watched his interactions with the other people present and realised he was mature, educated and extremely charming. She hated that she admired him, found him fascinating, but she did. The wicked voice in her head kept telling her that she’d never see him again, that no one would ever know, that maybe this was an opportunity to throw all responsibility and caution to the wind.

Kate chastised herself silently, hating the fact that she could be this weak, that she was even contemplating reciprocating the attraction, the flirting that she was receiving from this stranger.

                “Why do I get the feeling that you are getting pleasure from that fact?”

Ignoring the question, she met his eyes again, “what’s your name? I don’t dance with complete strangers.”

He leaned back, a knowing smile spread across his lips, “I’ll tell you, if you promise to take a walk with me, I could do with some fresh air after this dance.”

Kate should have slapped his face, shouted at him for this emotional blackmail, but he was having a strange effect on him, suddenly she wanted to know more about him. In eight years she’d not looked at another man, never imagined any other hands touching her, lips kissing her, but this man, his beautiful features, the stunning smell wafting in her nostrils were having some sort of hypnotic influence on her.

Mason had never been so conniving and so dastardly, but since setting eyes on her earlier in the day, he’d not really been conscious of thinking straight. Now he’d ‘persuaded’ her to go outside for what? He knew what he wanted to do, but bloody hell, hadn’t he learned that acting like this could get you into trouble. His enforced exile was testament to that, the last thing his mother wanted or needed was more scandal from him. His mind drifted to the woman he’d left at her home this morning, his tired and very downtrodden mother. He should’ve been here to lighten her load over the years, instead he was living it up in the Dubai. No, doing the wrong thing was definitely not on the agenda here. But then he acknowledged this Kate, beautiful, tall and as curvy as he appreciated a woman, and he knew he couldn’t resist her.

He didn’t expect her to agree to his demands, but as the song finished, she dropped the hand that had rested on his shoulder and looked at him intently. His heart lurched at the thought of being alone with her, so he took her hand and led her through the ballroom. They paused at the bar not wanting to draw attention to the fact that he was dragging her out into the dark night, then meandered more slowly out of the reception and then right into the terraced gardens.

Kate was savouring the sensation of his hand gripping hers, the forceful yet gentle way he was leading her out into the dark night. Her heels began to struggle on the soft grass, embedding themselves up to the hilt with each step.

                “Wait!” She almost stumbled and as he turned Mason reached out an arm to steady her, and it had the added effect of catapulting her into his chest. Two strong arms wrapped around her, and suddenly Kate was struggling to focus on anything other than the heat his body was generating and the swirls of excitement fluttering in her pelvis.

In the darkness Mason could barely make out Kate’s features, but he could feel she was there, close.

                “My name is Mason Fitzgerald,” he breathed against her lips, “and I haven’t wanted anyone as much as I want you in the longest time!”

Kate heard the words, she digested them, but the sensation of his lips, so close to hers, his breath on her cheek, his hands splayed across her spine, all distracted her beyond conscious thought.

                “Mason?” she breathed trying to respond to his words.

As he nodded, his lips brushed hers and it was like the spark touching the fuse of a whole display of fireworks. If a doctor had told her that her heart had stopped, she’d had believed it. After the biggest skip, her heart started to race, she was sure Mason...she liked that name...she was sure Mason could hear if not feel it.

Their lips touched again, this time with intention and for a moment she felt over powered by the firm pressure of those delectable lips, she was no wall flower and she wasn’t used to being dominated like this, but she wasn’t intimidated, she loved it. His lips were firm yet soft, controlling hers, encouraging her to relax, kiss him back, one of his large hands lifted to cup her jaw, long fingers reaching around to the back of her head, pulling her into him.

Initially she resisted, just absorbed the sensation of his teasing, cajoling mouth. When she finally relaxed, let her lips part, she heard a moan, and honestly didn’t know from which one of them it had emerged. Instead of allowing the one sided onslaught to continue, she pressed her lips up to his, and her tongue was the first to investigate, to seek his.

Devil woman! His mind raced as her tongue darted out, slipping between his lips. Groaning he secured his grip on her head and her spine, pulling him into her further. He was possessed by some ravenous desire to consume her, he almost stopped to shake his head in amazement at that distant thought, but he couldn’t have done it, he didn’t have cast iron willpower.

Kate struggled to stay upright, her knees were weak, he shoes impaled in the soft soil, she was trapped, yet hardly able to stand. Draping her arms around his neck, she lifted herself up to him and the hand secured at her back dropped to cup her bottom through the huge skirts. She loved that he knew what she wanted by that slight change in her position. Supported by him left her hands free to bury themselves into the dark hair that hung down to his collar, using her teeth, she tugged at his bottom lip, securing it with a gentle suck...and it was the final straw.

                “Shit!”  He lifted his head and looked down at her, now he was accustomed to the light he could make out her eyes, and they were glittering in what little light was cast. “As first kisses go, that was in the spectacular category!”

Kate was struggling to control her breathing, and the harsh void left by his retreating lips was like being doused with cold water. Shaking her head she stepped back.

                “I’m sorry, I don’t usually...that shouldn’t have happened.”

Spotting her turn to walk away, Mason was quick, reaching out to grab her arm, he stopped her moving, forced her to look up at him.

                “You’re alone at a wedding, you’re not wearing a ring of any kind, tell me what’s wrong with this?”

With that he lowered his head to plunder her lips with his own again. And it was more erotic than the first time. Kate found herself clinging to him with a desperation she’d thought long since dead and buried. She’d spent the last six years harnessing any passion or desire, ignoring lust, but somehow this man had turned a key and unlocked all those feelings in one tumbling mess.

Fighting without any real aggression, she managed to separate them, to push back from him a little, she felt as though she was drowning, but as she panted for breath, her thoughts started to clear and she surfaced from the overwhelming lust. That was all it was, she told herself, lust.

                “Mason...”

                “I love how my name sounds on your lips!” he breathed causing Kate to lose her track, the protests dying on her lips. Then with a groan he reached for her again, kissing her as though his life depended on it.

Kate could feel every inch of him pressed up against her, and despite the puff ball meringue of a dress that she was wearing, she could also tell that he was as excited and aroused as she was. It was the wakeup call she needed. She tried to back pedal, pushing him away, but her shoes were stuck in the ground so she gave a rather undignified wobble then fell to the floor.

Mason looked down at her sprawled on her backside and chuckled, “I’ve heard of people falling at your feet, but never thought it would happen to me!”

She lashed out with her hand and made rewarding contact with his shin, “don’t you dare laugh.”

He aided her to her feet, trying not to let the smile of humour break his deadpan face.

                “I can’t do this Mason, I may not have a ring, but that does not mean I’m free to do this! Please don’t follow me!”

Kicking off both her shoes, she ran across the lawn back to the hotel leaving him bewildered at her change of heart, though in all honesty she had consistently offered a very weak form of resistance. Instead he was intrigued, if she wasn’t single why would her own mother be pleased to see her dancing with an eligible man? And why would a happily involved woman cling so desperately to him in the darkness of these gardens?

Nope, instead of being angry or disappointed, he was intrigued...and even more keen on getting to know Kate more!

What about you? - 2

Chapter 2

Kate had made just two steps into the ballroom when a hand circled her wrist and stopped her in her tracks. Then a voice, so close to her ear that the warmth of the breath sent shivers down her spine whispered, “ingenious hiding place for your phone!”

Glancing down at the long masculine fingers, wrapped around her slim wrist, she froze, every nerve ending in her body hyper aware of this man, she didn’t need to turn to know it was him, the observer. Suddenly she realised that he’d seen her tuck her phone into her garter, her dress hoiked up to her waist and was wholly embarrassed. The flush of heat that swept up her neck and to her face was purely embarrassment she swore, and nothing to do with misplaced attraction.

She had no place doing this, being here. Without glancing back, she shrugged her arm free of him and made her way back to the top table, ignoring the imprint of each of those fingers still burning around her wrist. Kate had only picked at her food, but this encounter made her find an appetite and she ate a bit more of her meal. The champagne was free flowing and suddenly with this predator in the room she was at risk. Throwing back her head she closed her eyes, unfortunately she was more in more danger from her own actions and her own response to him than she was to the man himself.

Mason Fitzgerald watched her walk away and knew that it couldn’t end then, she was the most intriguing woman he’d ever seen. Beautiful, elegant despite the ugliest and most ill fitting bridesmaid’s dress that he’d ever cast eyes on adorning her almost Amazonian figure.  Then there was the flash of those absolutely breathtaking legs that he’d seen as she’d retrieved a telephone. Shaking his head, he watched her enter the room. No, this woman was something special, and he had a feeling that things would never be the same again.

Swallowing some of the dry pale drink Kate’s fraught nerves seemed to settle slightly, that was until she saw the very same man move to one of the round tables and slide into a seat, his eyes never left her.

Toby, Stuart’s best friend from school stood and started the speeches, Roger first, talking of his beautiful daughter and the wonderful man she’d met. Thanking her mother for accepting them so readily into her fold, and then he looked down at her, “and thank you Kate for being part of this day.”

She smiled up at him a thank you, then as her eyes drifted back to the room, she met ‘his’ eyes, and he mouthed the word “Kate?” With a raised eyebrow, acknowledging her identity, and as though testing the sound of the word on his lips.

She groaned, this was getting complicated.

Once her brother and Toby had stopped swiping gibes at each other via their own speeches, the tables were cleared and the band started to strike up a chord. 

                “Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you the new Mr and Mrs Michaels!”

To a hail of applause the band started the first dance and Kate felt her jaw drop at the sight of her brother waltzing, actually dancing with his wife! He was a typical farmer, happiest in welly boots and waterproofs, but here he was light and graceful moving around the floor. It was both unexpected and a pleasant sight. Her little brother had grown up.

                “He’s had lessons!” she didn’t mistake the sound of Toby next to her, “and if I’m not mistaken, as soon as this song finishes, tradition dictates the best man dances with the Maid of Honour!”

                “Less of the Maid!” she nudged him in the ribs, “I might be twenty eight, but I’m far from over the hill!”

Leading her out to join the parents who were now dancing too, he grinned, “never said you were!”

Toby expertly twisted her around the floor, laughingly passing comment on all the people they both knew. She was chuckling uncontrollably when the song ended.

                “Thanks for the dance Kate, I miss us goofing about, we used to have such fun!”

The familiar twang hit her chest, the one that she got whenever she thought of the past. She nodded, “but things change!”

Sadly he offered a half smile, “You’re right Kate, I only wish they didn’t!” But there was more poignancy in his words than their face value.

The sadness that had been the measure of her life the last few years seemed to return and she made for the bar, wine or vodka usually helped in these moments. The bar area was packed, as the ceremonial first dance had given way to general dancing, the bystanders seemed to have drifted in the direction of the bar.

                “Oh Kate!” A voice called out and she groaned as she recognised that of her Great Aunt Hilda. She’d managed to wave to relatives from a distance until now, and avoided those piteous looks and comments, but she should’ve known that Aunt Hilda would single her out.

                “Aunt Hilda!” She announced, stopping to greet the tiny octogenarian, “you’re looking glamorous!”

Hilda smiled, “unlike you. I have to say,” her words were a conspiratorial whisper, “that dress is as gaudy as they come, but then in anything nicer you’d have outshone the bride. I’m not surprised she chose it for you!”

                “Aunt Hilda!” she gasped as the older woman’s bluntness.

               

She waved a hand as if to dismiss her protests, “Pah! You know it’s true. She seems a nice girl, but she’s just that, a girl. Your brother isn’t thinking with his head!” She reached out and took her hand, “it should be you darling, you and Peter, but maybe you should just let him go, move on?”

It was the same every time, no wonder she rarely came home, she’d made her choice. All she wanted was for her family to both accept and respect that. Instead she had the relentless attempts to change her mind, the suggestions that she ‘see sense’, or ‘move on’. But she couldn’t, she wouldn’t. She wished people would understand that.

                “Vodka rocks.” She regretted the way her voice came out as a growl, but the young barman disappeared before returning with a tumbler filled to her request. The wedding had unlimited wine provided in the ballroom, but the general bar wasn’t free. When the young boy asked her for payment, she foolishly remembered that she didn’t have a pocket let alone a bag, purse, wallet...cash! “Um...Can you just hold on a second?” She blushed and was about to rush off to find her mother or Toby or even a distant relative when a hand reached over her shoulder waving a twenty pound note.

                “I’ll get that!”

Kate instantly recognised the smoky deep voice and the hairs on her neck stood on end a sign that her suddenly attention seeking libido recognised it too. Taking a steadying breath, she turned and tried not to gawp or stare. The man who stood a few inches from her was, she already knew attractive. But this close she could study his fathomless blue eyes that sat between long dark lashes that would make any woman jealous, the straight nose, high cheekbones and the fullest lips she’d ever seen.  He was indecently good looking and she could barely control her racing heart.

                “There’s no need, I just need to find...”

He placed a finger over her lips and she expected to see sparks emitting from the contact. If it fazed him as much as her, he hid it well.

                “It’s just a drink, hardly a proposal of marriage. You can accept without losing your dignity or your independence!”

He asked for a shot of bourbon for himself then paid for the drinks, as he pocketed the change, he laughed at her still stunned expression, then clinked his glass against hers, “cheers Kate!”

It was all a bit much for Kate, she didn’t cope well with attention of any time, so this blatant flirting would be hard enough if she didn’t find herself attracted to him. And that was something that never happened, as she’d kept telling herself all day. She’d not looked at another man since Peter.

Gulping the sudden choke of emotion, she muttered, “thank-but-I-have-to-go!” Downing the warming vodka she deposited the glass then made for the bathroom at a virtual run.

Yet again Mason found himself watching the rear of her beating a hasty retreat. He knew she felt the same spark that he did, he’d seen her slight gasp as he’d touched her, the flare of her eyes, the flush of desire sweeping her neck. No, she was attracted to him, there was no ring. This could be a fun evening after all.

He lifted his drink to his lips and swallowed it all, the sour burn causing him to shudder. He was nothing if a patient man, and he loved nothing more than a game of cat and mouse!

Kate was never more grateful for booking a room in the hotel than that moment. After crossing through the crowds she turned away from the bathroom and headed to the lobby. In the safety of her room, she raided the mini bar and drank a couple of shots, her preferred vodka, then whisky and finally a gin, which almost made her gag. Then as tears of frustration and self loathing fell from her eyes, she slumped onto the bed and cried.

It was a while later that she got to her feet and wandered into the bathroom. Her face was puffy and red, her makeup streaked across her face, the dress that she disliked so much was creased. She looked a mess. But she knew that it was important to the bride and groom that she played her part. If it was up to her she’d change into her jeans and leave. Run off into the distance away from this place, these people who challenged her beliefs and the man who made her doubt herself.

Cold water and fresh makeup did seem to help her look more presentable. But she was still self conscious as she rejoined the party. As she descended the stairs to the reception, she saw her brother walking towards her.

                “Are you ok?” She accepted a bear hug from her little brother as he looked her up and down, worry etching his face. Kate felt awful, here was her brother on the most special day of his life worrying about her...again!

                “I’m fine, I just needed to have a few minutes to relax. It’s hard trying to live up to your wife! She’s a born socialiser!”

He laughed, “oh that she is! Are you sure you’re ok? Toby thought he might have upset you.”

She smiled and hugged Stuart, “you don’t need to worry about me! I’m fine. You and Mum seem to make it a full time job!”

His look was anything but assured, “but you...”

Holding up a hand she stopped him, “go and find you wife, and dance with her. You only get one wedding day! I...am...fine!” She stressed each word, then stretched to kiss his cheek.

Nodding he disappeared.

Back in the ballroom she took a deep breath and made an effort, dancing with her Uncle Adam, her father’s brother, then her elderly grandfather, who was about to leave for his bed. Exhausted after a jaunty jig, she saw him to the stairs with a smile, then turned to see her mother watching.

                “You ok Mum?”

She nodded and reached for her daughter’s hand, “I’m more than that. You seem like my Kate again tonight. I haven’t seen that in a long time!”

Kate hugged her, “I’m always ‘your’ Kate. You know that.” Leaving an arm around her mother’s shoulder, they both walked back towards the music filled ballroom.

                “How long are you staying?” her mother didn’t dare to look up at her daughter, and Kate knew she was struggling to control her emotion.

                “I was hoping to come to the house? Maybe have some lunch with you? If you’re free?”

Her mother spun to her beaming, “of course I’m free. I would LOVE to cook you lunch. In fact, I may have some of my sausages in the freezer!”

                “My mouth is watering already!” She swooped to kiss her mother’s cheek, the farm produced special sausages were her favourite thing, so her mouth watered at the thought. She tried to ignore the tug of guilt she felt at her mother’s desperation to please her. She deserved better.

She seemed to have spent the whole day sighing, but as she watched her mother heading to the dance floor with her Uncle Adam, a most accomplished dancer, she did sigh.

                “I keep asking myself why one of the bridesmaids at this wedding would be so angry and so sad...but I can’t come up with any answers.”

With a zing every inch of her body became aware of the voice that had already become familiar. Refusing to turn to look at him, she shrugged, “things are rarely what they seem!”

The response was a chuckle, a warm sound and Kate tried to move away from the danger of him, but he seemed intent on riling her, stalking after her.

                “Can I have a dance Kate? After all this is a wedding, and it’s kind of custom.” He’d watched her all evening, she was a great dancer, sexy and flirtatious in an unintentional way. His body burned to hold her close, even she couldn’t object to a dance in a room full of people.

It was the last thing that Kate wanted or needed, to get closer to this man, but as she looked up, she saw her mother watching her over Uncle Adam’s shoulder, her face lit up with hope. If she could tolerate a dance with this man then she’d at least make her mother think she was ‘moving on’, even if she wasn’t.

                “Ok,” she offered, “but purely to make my mother happy!”

What about you?

What about you?

Chapter 1

Kate gazed at her reflection, ‘done up like a dog’s dinner’ was how her old gran would have described her, the bridesmaids dress was what Tilly her best friend would also termed a meringue. Salmon pink cap sleeves decorated a fitted salmon pink bodice that dipped a little too low on her ample cleavage, and the same colour full hooped skirt topped off the ensemble, all in a shiny satin sheen. She felt if not looked like the salmon gateau the farm cats were fed on their birthday. Not that her parents remembered each of the seventeen cats actual birthday, they had a joint special cat day on April the seventh. Why then she didn’t know. But it had been a tradition her father had started before she was born.

Wriggling desperately to try and accommodate her larger than average breasts into the ill-fitting dress she grimaced. It was no good. It looked hideous, and her pale skin looked almost alabaster next to the pink lace trim. She tucked a few more pins into her long dark hair, piling the ebony curls on to the top of her head, and then touched up her makeup.

She was ready before the tap at the door. “Come in!”

Her mother stood at the door, an emotional look on her face as she took in the sight of her only daughter. Using a finger she swiped at a tear as she tried to smile at Kate.

Kate shook her head, “I know those are tears of sympathy!”  She smiled trying to make light of a tense encounter.

                “I was just thinking how...unique you look, but you can carry off anything Katie, you should’ve been a model!” Her mother was older than Kate remembered, her short blonde hair was now virtually all grey, and there were wrinkled around her mouth and eyes that hadn’t been there before. And not for the first time she felt tremendous guilt, this time for not visiting more often, not being the daughter she always had been.

                “A model!” She scoffed, “hardly Mum, I’m too chubby for that. Pity I inherited the Michaels genes, you Smith’s are the model quality!” her father had been dark and tall like herself, but he too had been stocky, and his mother and sisters were all ‘blessed’ with very defined hour glass figures. She hugged her mother and the delicate petite woman seemed more fragile than ever before.

Her mother hugged her back with an almost desperate fury, then smiled adoringly at the daughter she loved and missed, handing her the shoes that had been selected for her, “You are anything but chubby! You are a beautiful woman, which is why I hate seeing you throw your life away!”

Kate shook her head and gave her mother a ‘don’t go there’ glare. Change of subject required, she asked, “So what is she like this Paula? Is Stuart happy?” She loved her little brother and couldn’t believe he was marrying at just twenty four, there was another wave of guilt and remorse that she’d yet to meet the woman he was marrying, the woman she was about to be bridesmaid to.

Her mother nodded, “they’re well suited, and he loves her to distraction. And her loving the farm life is such a big bonus, I feared he’d be romanced off to the bright lights and the Big Smoke like you, then I’d really have to sell up!”

The pain in Kate’s chest was immense, this was part of the reason why she didn’t come home, she didn’t need the guilt in her life, or the memories of her father in every place she looked. Nodding unable to speak, her voice in danger of cracking, she tried to fasten the clasp of her necklace but her shaking hands made it impossible.

                “Here, let me!” Her mother took over, and once the locket fell down secure to nestle between her breasts, her mother sighed. “I wish you’d come home more often! I promised myself I wouldn’t nag, but this is the first time since your father’s funeral, and that was almost a year ago. I miss you!”

                “You know I find it hard Mum, I have no free time...work’s hard...”

Her mother shook her head, “and of course there’s the guilt you’ve forced yourself to live with. Unnecessarily, as you well know.”

                “Don’t do this Mum, please. Not here, not now.”

Shaking her pale bob haircut her mother sighed, “you’re throwing your life away Kate, this should be you getting married, happy looking to the future. Instead you’re living in the past. I know you hate talking about this, but there will never be the right time for you. And it breaks my heart.”

                “Mum!”  Tears well welling and Kate knew she was about to lose control. “I’m doing what I feel is right, and that’s the only way I can live.”

As usual the stubborn daughter did not yield to the desperate mother, and so Kate gave herself a shake then stepped out to find the much talked about bride.

Paula was all that Kate expected and the petite blonde has gone for the full fairytale wedding. She smiled and hugged Kate as she arrived in the room that had become Paula’s for the day. The three other bridesmaids were tiny lithe blondes like their friend, so at almost five ten, she dwarfed the wedding party in a ridiculous fashion. Everything was coordinated and harmonized; no stone had been left unturned. She hated thinking of the word tacky, or chav, but unfortunately that was what the wedding was, tacky and overstated, but she looked at her brother with such devotion from under her false eyelashes that Kate was in no doubt that she loved Stuart as much as he loved her. She’d bring life to the Michaels farm both in herself and the children that Kate had no doubt would soon follow.

She played her role in escorting the bride to her brother, along with the three amigos as she’d already started to think of them. How ironic that salmon pink satin suited petite blondes with fake tans, yet tall pasty looking brunettes were definitely not at their best. The service passed, and all too soon it was photos and the pomp that came with the reception. Stuart’s pleasure at her being at the wedding was so obvious and again she felt awful that she didn’t visit more often, that she wasn’t more involved in the day’s activities.

Kate went along with everything, trying not to sound ungrateful, she hated that people would see her as standoffish or maybe even snobbish, it was Stuart’s day, and she just had to count the moments until she could get out of this hideous dress. She’d deal with the family, the comments, the recriminations and the pity later. Oh yes, she knew exactly what the day would have in store.

For the wedding breakfast, she was sat at the top table, on display to the marquee filled with some familiar but largely unfamiliar faces. Sitting at one end, she turned to the man sat next to her, the father of the bride Roger. When she introduced herself she spotted a slight change in his expression just before he gushed at how much he loved her brother, her mother, the family home. Pity? She wondered as she answered all his ‘safe’ questions about her work as an advertising executive, her small flat in South London.   He then helped her catch up on the politics and identified the major players in his family. She learned that her new sister in law had one brother Brandon, but his wife was due to give birth at any moment in Dubai where he worked in the oil industry, so he wasn’t at the wedding, but both Roger and his wife Sandra had large families, which more than made up for the fact that they weren’t there. Kate noticed the same rueful smile as he assured her that her mother used when she opted out of any family event. Why was there so much guilt in the world? She wondered as she excused herself. All she wanted was to do the right thing and get on with her life. Was it that hard?

Leaving the table, she made for the foyer and was directed to the bathrooms. There she sighed and sank down to sit on the closed toilet lid, the layers of net and tulle that filled out the meringue part of her dress squeezing around her meaning she could barely see forward. It wasn’t an ideal hiding place, so she gathered her skirts and headed outside on to the terrace. It wasn’t a warm September day, but it was dry, lowering herself to a step that lead from the terrace to the gardens.

Rifling under her skirts, she pulled her phone from its hiding place tucked in to the band of elastic that kept her stocking held up. The speed dial connected quickly and the sing song voice of Tilly answered, “So how is it girlfriend?”

Kate closed her eyes and sighed, “As you’d expect, lace flowers and perfume! With a bit of luck I can get out of this dress, which I hasten to add is WORSE than you predicted, and get some sleep.”

                “I told you not to do too much yesterday, you should have got down there early instead of stopping off for the evening.”

Kate sighed, “I can’t just drop everything Tilly, you know that.”

                “I know you deserve to have a bit of fun. And if you’d got down there earlier last night you may have met up with a few more people and it would’ve been easier today.”

                “So says Tilly the Great!” Whilst she was a little flippant and sarcastic, she loved Tilly with all her heart and knew she was right. Everyone was right...and so wrong.

               

Chuckling warmly she asked, “When are you back? If it’s tomorrow come for dinner, Mike and Steve have agreed. But I don’t know if I can cope with both of them without you!” Kate had shared a home with Mike and Steve since leaving University, they and Tilly were the only ones who knew everything about her, and as a support network, they were more than priceless. Tilly lived with her rather rich fiancé Ashton an American financier, whatever that was, in Knightsbridge, part of the deal of going to dinner there was their absolutely stunning home.

                “I NEVER turn down coming to see you, you know that. And dinner is a date!”

As she disconnected the call, she felt an overwhelming wave of grief. She’d look forward to dinner the following day; it would be the highlight of her weekend. Because she knew that come Monday life would return to the mundane, the duty and the hell. Her head dropped and she fought tears for a few seconds. Then with a deep breath she physically shook herself.

Sliding the phone back into her garter, Kate pulled the hideous dress down over her legs and pulled herself to her feet. As she readjusted her clothing, she noticed a pair of eyes watching her, a man stood at the door back into the hotel. Dark collar length hair framed his tanned face, a smile of appreciation on his face.

It was a long time since Kate had had anyone look at her like that, with longing, attraction and she didn’t know what to make of it. Her heart fluttered as she stepped back towards the hotel, her head held high. Flirting had never harmed anyone, and that was as far as it would ever go, she knew that, so why not.

As she drew level with the man, she admired him for a second, despite not breaking her stride, then ducked through the door back into the ballroom.