You Got It Wrong - Part Nineteen

Chapter Nineteen

Nina’s eyes were level with Theo’s shoulder, and chin, she couldn’t see his eyes, and she was really glad about that. His hands were attracting ALL her attention, splayed across her back just a few inches from her buttocks. They were warm, firm and controlling, moving her around the dance floor; in contrast, her hands were on his chest, just below his shoulders, and she felt weak, overwhelmed, the hands were helping her to balance more than anything else. She’d never known her heart race so loudly that it drowned out the music, and she’d never had the butterflies that threatened to uproot the wine, beer and food she’d consumed that day, and never had a smell penetrate her senses so deeply as the musky aftershave that Theo Peterson wore.

She wanted to run; this was far too intimate, far too risky, and far too exposing. Glancing to her left, she spotted Lilah in Daniel’s arms. The two were laughing, him repeatedly leaning in to whisper in her ear. Nina couldn’t even bring herself to meet Theo’s eyes. Terrified.

Theo could feel her shaking. He’d found her proximity unnerving, drugging, exciting, but he wouldn’t want to push her away. He wanted her to smile, to look at him and laugh at the same time that their bodies touched. He wanted her happy, willing, not petrified and quivering.

                “If I’d known it was this easy to shut up your errant tongue I’d have danced with you in France.”

It was a risk, she could storm off at the whisper, but she didn’t, she looked up, met his eyes, and he was lost. He’d not got close enough to study her so intently, she had freckles across her snub nose, and lip gloss on her full lips. But it wasn’t those observations that made his heart race, it was those eyes, blue, dark blue, framed by long eyelashes that he knew were natural, big innocent terrified eyes. If they’d been alone he’d have fought the overwhelming desire to kiss her, but they weren’t alone, and it would be a disaster. He had no interest in anyone else, he didn’t want to meet a woman, share his life with anyone, and he already knew that Nina wasn’t the sort of woman who did casual, no strings sex. The thought of that made his body surge and he fought it away as rapidly as he could.

She was staring at him and it was a moment until she responded and his voice was husky and thick with emotion, “and I’d have shown you how GREAT an idea that would have been.”

His voice, a breath in her ear, caused goose bumps to rise all over her skin, “I can only imagine.”

She sighed at that, no real response other than to fight the sensation of drowning. The song ended and people started to applaud the band, it was the sign that Nina needed, the chance to take stock.

Taking a deep breath she pushed away from him slightly, then gave him a genial smile. As she was about to speak, to break the spell, he spoke, “saved by the bell, hey?”

                “I’ve had too much to drink.”

She hated that he stared at her, almost seeing through the excuse that that was. She needed space, time, somewhere to breathe without him dominating everything.

He lifted an eyebrow, “I didn’t take you for a coward Nina.”

                “I’m not a coward...I don’t even know if I like you.”

He laughed, “I’m rude, arrogant, inconsiderate...you’ve made those thoughts perfectly clear.”

                “You forgot egocentric, annoying and judgemental.”

Again he laughed, and there was me thinking you were starting to like me.”

Nina shook her head resolutely, “I cost more than a beer and a dance Mr Peterson!”

As she sat back at her table uncaring for a moment where Theo was, she felt a hand on her shoulder and Lilah sat beside her, “you didn’t tell me his brother is the Daniel Gershwin.” Nina had no idea what that meant and her face must have portrayed that, as Lilah groaned.  “He’s one of the new wave MP’s, there’s rumour he’s being lined up for a cabinet position and they are already talking about his being PM one day.”

Nina shrugged, “you know how uninterested in politics I am.”

                “But he is like the polar opposite of your father in all that he stands for, don’t you find that interesting?”

Sighing she took Lilah’s hand, “let me remind you, politics is an unforgiving mistress, I’d not head willingly or purposefully into that relationship!”

                “We had a dance, and a chuckle, that is as far as it goes. I’m not about to dive into things. I promise.”

Nina nodded.

                “Unlike you.”

That made her head snap up, “what do you mean?”

Lilah laughed, “be defensive as much as you want, but the tension between you and he 'whose name shall not be mentioned' is smoking hot!”

Theo was propped at the bar watching Nina and Lilah, they were dancing with a couple of oldies, they were some distant relatives, but he didn’t know them well.

                “She is a proper fireball.”

He looked up at his brother, always so controlled, so demure, “she is...I don’t even know where to start.”

That made Daniel laugh, “really? Now that is interesting!”

                “You reckon?”

Daniel patted him on the shoulder, “Sadie is Sadie, not everyone is like her, not everyone is so shallow, so selfish.” When that was met with a shrug he laughed, “you’ve got it bad little bro, real bad.”

The ruffled him, he wasn’t about to lose his mind over another woman, especially one who so obviously hated him. “You’re wrong Daniel. She’s an acquaintance, someone I know through Mansell, that’s all. She’ll never be more than that.”

If only he’d spotted Daniel’s eyes widening, the slight nod towards his right he’d have spotted her standing in earshot. Instead he’d dived in once again with both feet and finished up on the wrong end of a sad and derogatory look from Nina.

As she shook her head and stormed off, Daniel patted him on the shoulder, “you are one idiotic brother, you know that?”

Nina had been determined not to cry all night, but the sterility of a hotel room, the possible proximity to the man who she’d hated for so long troubled her. He’d shown her nothing but contempt, he’d been derogatory, he thought she was better than him, but still he’d managed to penetrate her defences. Nina hadn’t let anyone in for years, if she kept distinct boundaries, she knew how to deal with things, she could cope, life worked well. But he’d got under that guard, made her think he was different...made her feel SHE was different. With an angry grunt, she punched the pillow.

                “You ok?” Lilah’s sleepy voice asked from the adjacent bed.

                “I’m fine, just can’t sleep, going to go for a walk. Ok?”

                “Whattimeisit?” she asked almost back asleep.

Nina smiled, “too early for you to be up.”

Six am on a Sunday morning and the streets of London were anything but busy, this was a time she loved, and her childhood home of London was almost bearable when it was like this, deserted, quiet. She left the hotel and strolled along the embankment. It was sunny already the summer was proving to be an exceptional one. After fifteen minutes she was feeling better, her head was clear, she was less angry and less aggressive. A cafe overlooking the London Eye was just opening, so she stopped for coffee and a ham and cheese croissant. And felt like a completely different person with her stomach full, caffeine surging in her veins.

Twenty minutes later and she was recovered, well as much as she could be with all her mental trauma, so she strolled at a far less energetic pace back to the hotel.

Lilah was still groaning from beneath the duvet when Nina returned with a McDonald’s breakfast for them both. The concierge had frowned when she’d entered the lavish reception, so Nina had winked at him and the sauntered to the lift. That made her smile, and she was still giggling when Lilah finally emerged from under her duvet to grab a coffee.

They travelled back to Brighton by train, and Lilah complained that she was dying all the way. So it was no surprise that she disappeared into her room as soon as they got home.

Nina, needing to be occupied, headed to her workshop and started on some bespoke designs, not heavy work, she wasn’t up for that, but designing, that was what the doctor ordered.

Later in the day her phone buzzed and that caught her attention, glancing at the screen she grimaced at the message from an unrecognised number. Curiosity won over and she opened it, and it only caused her to groan.

                ‘Sorry about last night. I am a complete bastard.’

She knew who it was, despite the lack of signature. She stared at it, angry, fuming at his attempt at...what was that? Wit? Self deprecation?

Tossing the phone to one side she ignored it for over an hour, but as she worked she became more and more distracted by exactly what she wanted to shout at Theo Peterson. A text message was never enough.

Eventually she gave in and grabbed her phone.

                ‘I don’t even know what that was. It definitely wasn’t an apology. I really want you to leave me alone. I have never asked you for anything. So please delete my number.’

Again Nina tossed the phone away, but it bleeped and buzzed almost immediately. She lasted half an hour before she packed everything up then snatched at the phone and stormed upstairs.

There were beers in the fridge and despite the fact that they’d had plenty to drink the previous night, she needed one, as she took a good glug from the bottle, she took out her phone.

                ‘Don’t blame you for being like this. I’m visiting Mansell tomorrow. Will you meet me, let me explain?’

She’d replied with a NO. Capital letters AND an exclamation mark. SO why, at five o’clock the following day, did she find herself heading in the direction of the hospital that housed Mansell Gershwin.