You Got It Wrong - Part Thirty

Chapter Thirty

Nina held Lilah helplessly in her arms and tried to comfort her. It seemed ages until her friend’s body started to relax, a hint that she was asleep. Once that happened, Nina could cuddle her into the pillows then think back through all she’d said, all she’d hinted at.

Nina knew nothing about Mark, the man that Lilah had been on a few dates with. Usually her friend was transparent, if anyone kept secrets then it was Nina, this was so out of character for Lilah. She thought back to the last few weeks and months, she’d been absorbed with her love/hate war with Theo Peterson, that she’d neglected her friend. She KNEW she was fragile, knew that dating again was a huge step. Then there was Daniel. Something had happened between them, she was sure of that, and again Nina had ignored it, ignored her friend’s distress. She was devastated, Lilah was never the type to mess around between two men, and the fact that she’d headed out the previous evening intent on playing one off against the other...Nina groaned, she should have KNOWN, she could have stopped this. Not that this was anyone but this bastard Mark’s fault. NO one deserved what he’d done to her friend, NO one. No matter what had preceded it.

She stroked Lilah’s hair, tucking the stray strands behind her ear, then left the room, she needed to get away for moment.

Sat downstairs with coffee, she still couldn’t get her head around the fact that someone had  hurt Lilah, generous, loving and beautiful Lilah, rape...she had no clue how horrendous that must be, and to find Lilah with the bleach, trying to rid herself of the memory, of the touch of the bastard. It terrified her, if she hadn’t broken into the bathroom how much would she have done? Where would this have ended?

Nina shuddered. She had no idea how to cope with this, no clue how to manage things.

Lilah slept until morning, and apart from the bouts of dreams, the shouts, the cries that happened several times, she slept well. But Nina was awake a head of her and waiting for her eyes to open.

                “Hey,” she offered at the first fluttering of lashes.

Lilah struggled to open her puffy eyes for a moment, but when she focussed on her friend, Nina could see the terror there, “don’t hide from me Lilah. OK?”

                “I want to pretend it didn’t happen.” Her first words were defensive, distancing her from the event. But Nina knew nothing was that easy.

She took her hand, squeezed it, and when Lilah’s eyes opened again, Nina’s were level with them, “none of this is your fault. He did this, you are innocent, ok?” Lilah tried to evade her gaze, so she grabbed her chin and forced her to look at her, “you can’t pretend it didn’t happen, you have to talk about it, you have to deal with it. Because I’m not letting this ruin you, you here?”

A solitary tear escaped her eye and she closed them, biting her lip.

Nina had never felt so helpless, so frustrated, so angry as she did watching her friend struggle to function, to cope. “We should go to the police.”

                “NO!” Lilah’s terror was complete, “no way.”

                “But they can get him; he can be put away for it.”

Lilah shook her head, “I go to the police, they will poke and prod me. IF it gets to court I’ll have to face him, describe what he did...” she shuddered. “EVERYONE will know what happened, and I can’t cope with that. I want to forget. Move on.”

It was Nina’s turn to shake her head, “it is not that easy. You know that.”

But Lilah had rolled away from her, closed her eyes, “no one else can know. You are my friend. You can’t betray me.”

Those words haunted Nina as she set about her Monday work. Lilah had locked herself in her room, and whilst that worried Nina, she knew her friend needed some time. She had some work to do, she had to keep the rest of the world afloat as things were so up in the air, and the business, the jewellery, the designing, it had to keep going.

She’d worked diligently, and emerged at mid afternoon pleased with herself, and for the moments she was absorbed in work, she could almost, but not really, pretend that nothing was wrong.

Lilah was in the lounge, in her pyjamas, knees curled up in front of her, the news on TV full of financial crisis and natural disasters ripping apart countries that were ill prepared to cope with it. Lilah was watching the plight of a family in Africa coping with living with AIDS, highlighted in HD detail.

                “Hey?”

She looked up with a smile, “sorry for earlier, I was being stupid.”

                “No you weren’t!” Nina lowered herself to the arm of the opposite chair, “you were anything but. “I still think you should take it further.”

                “NO!” Lilah snapped at her, “I’ve told you that won’t be happening. SO let it go.”

Nina strolled out into the kitchen and poured a drink, she didn’t know how to deal with this emotionally charged Lilah, one minute crying, another angry, resentful, they’d both been blessed with fairly stress free lives, other than the split with her boyfriend and Nina’s dreadful family, they lived in bliss.

She couldn’t snap, couldn’t shout at her friend, she had to remember that this wasn’t her friend, this was a traumatised person and she couldn’t snap at her.

                “Do you want some dinner? Or shall we go out for Nando’s special?”

Lilah appeared at the doorway, a tear trailing down her cheek, “I’m sorry for shouting...I’m just...out of sorts.”

Nina’s heart bled for her friend, and she walked over and pulled her into a bear hug, “I’m not worried if you snap at me, but I AM worried about you.”

Lilah offered a pained smile, “I’ll be fine. I just don’t want anyone to know. I don’t want people to talk about me...judge me.”

Nina wanted to protest at how Lilah was innocent, that she had no reason to feel so at fault, but then she had no idea how her friend was feeling, how violated, how destroyed.

                “No one does, no one would. But you don’t have to question whether I’d say anything. I wouldn’t, you know that.”

Lilah nodded with a grateful look, “Nando's? Extra hot sauce?”

The following day Nina was up early she’d barely slept, and she knew that Lilah hadn’t slept either, she cried out so many times in her sleep, that it wasn’t truly until about four am that she seemed to settle. Nina had spent the night back and forth between their rooms, and in the end she’d slept next to her friend, once again holding her tight as she shook in pain and desolation.

                “Sorry it’s early, and sorry I haven’t been in touch...family hell. You still good for tomorrow? Hope so, I can’t wait to see you. Theo”

The message appearing on her phone both surprised and pleased her, not that she’d be able to leave Lilah, not the way that she was. So she reluctantly replied.

                “Hi, I’ve not text either, ditto. Been a bit random here, and may have to cancel tomorrow. Needs must. Can I confirm in the morning?”

She poured herself a mug of coffee as she waited for his reply.

“You’re killing me slowly! Of course I’m ok if you cancel, but I do SO hope you manage to clear your diary. I can’t wait to see you and can’t see much space in my diary the rest of the week. Purely selfish motives.”

She moaned softly at that, the thought of an hour in his company, to have him listen to her, flatter her, talk to her...instead she’d be home trying to find a way out of the torment of her best friend’s life. She didn’t begrudge that, she HATED what had happened, hated that the sparkle had left her friend’s eyes, but she rued the almost comedic timing of everything.

Lilah’s’ blisters were angry and rather evil looking, Nina wasn’t happy, but her friend was morose, reluctant to get out of bed, and wouldn’t entertain the thought of a doctor looking at her wounds. Nina was concerned on SO many levels, the trauma of the incident, the crime, her mental health, her wounds. Each factor was a worry, and she was willing to put as much effort into making Lilah do something about it. She lived in denial for large parts of the day, then broke down when it all caught up with her. If she wouldn’t report it, seek justice, then she had to deal with it, counselling, that was the next stage, and Nina spent the best part of the day searching for a suitable therapist locally. Finding one would be easy, but getting Lilah to attend, to be honest...that was another thing.

                “So can I see you later?”

Nina’s heart lurched at the sound of Theo’s warm voice along the phone line, she wanted nothing more than to spend a late lunch with him, but she had more pressing issues on her plate.

                “I’m not going to make it, I’m sorry.”

She could hear the disappointment in his voice as he replied, “I understand, I’m not exactly giving you much...”

She sighed, “it’s not that Theo, I swear, it’s just something has cropped up and I can’t leave here really. Can we rearrange?”

                “You know how crap things are for me. I’m trying to get things sorted. I’ll call you later when I’ve juggled my full diary. I am sorry Nina, this probably sounds as though I’m not bothered, but I am.”

That confession made her blush and she was only glad that he wasn’t in the room to see the effect it had had on her, “I understand Theo, we are both busy, both have commitments. How’s Mansell?”

He sighed, “frustrated, upset.”

                “I’m going to call and see him soon, when I get chance, take him some chocolate. He’ll like that.”

                “You are too generous; he’ll love to see you, though arguably not as much as I would.”

It was her turn to sigh, “I’m sorry. Another time I’ll be there. Ok?”

As she reluctantly ended the call, she looked up to see Lilah leaning against the door frame to the kitchen watching her.

                “What are you putting on hold? Don’t for me...”

Nina smiled, she didn’t want to rub in the fact that she had Theo, not when it had gone so disastrously wrong for her friend, “nothing, was just going to meet someone later...”

                “Theo?”

Nina blushed, dropped her eyes for a moment, when she finally looked up, Lilah was in front of her, “don’t blow him off for me. I was horrible to you on the weekend, I didn’t mean it, I was just hurt...angry...”

                “With good reason. Look, if he’s worth it, he’ll wait. You on the other hand, as much as you want to deny it, you and me need to do stuff, how about the cinema later?”

Lilah shook her head, “life goes on. Amelia comes home later; I said I’d meet her for a few drinks, then some business chatter. Shall we head to the big smoke together?”

Theo had always been creative, practical, being the boss of the renovating company took him away from what he loved doing, and instead forced him into meetings, planning, budgets. Today’s meeting was going to be offset by lunch with Nina, and that had made it seem worthwhile, but now, instead, he had no sweetener, nothing to look forward to, nothing to make it tolerable. Instead he had a meeting in the city, a huge banking company had a huge amount of vacant office space they wanted converted into a training centre, accommodation, a restaurant, a HUGE project if he got it. And that meant selling his abilities, he had faith in his team in the capabilities of his company, but he his heart just wasn’t in it today.

He hated travelling to the city, hated being away from the creative part of his world and hated wearing a suit for work reasons. So it was no surprise that he scowled when he arrived at the immaculate marble fronted bank with his huge portfolio carrier under his arm.

He didn’t believe in over digitalising everything, his plans, constructed by him and his architect colleague were on traditional boards that needed to be displayed in the offices. Awkward to carry, but he still felt were more impressive than computer screen images.

The presentation went well, they were accomplished, and this, whilst being a big job, was not beyond their scope, and he knew they’d do an amazing job. Fortunately the bankers seemed to be impressed and that was a good thing. With a promise of “we’ll be in touch”, he and Tim, the architect, emerged out into the bright early afternoon sunshine.

                “What you up to now Theo? Back to the site?”

They were working on another big project across town. Theo shook his head, “not sure yet, but I’m not heading all the way back there. If I change and drive there, it’ll be almost time to leave.”

Tim nodded, “well I’m back to the office if you need me?”

                “Well then you can take these?” he handed Tim the boards then watched him climb in a taxi.

With a sigh of frustration, he turned to call his own cab when a voice gained his attention, looking across the forecourt of the bank; he spotted the oasis in the desert, the shelter in a storm.

Nina. Sat there, looking delicious in a cute sundress, smiling at him. As he walked toward her, she smiled, “surprise!”