Reasons Why - 20

Chapter 20

New York! Chloe stepped out of the hotel reception into the bustling street and smiled. This was everything she’d imagined. She’d arrived late the previous evening, and had wandered up to Times Square after settling into her room. She’d loved the hustle and bustle, the lights, the people. She’d reluctantly gone to bed but now here she was about to spend a whistle stop twenty four hours in this City. She’d had to rearrange her flights home now that she was going home earlier, but she couldn’t resist sampling New York, that had always been part of her plan, and the three day stopover had dropped to thirty-six hours. She was determined to enjoy this day, make the most of this last gasp of freedom. Home, the court case, the heartache ahead were all on the horizon as gloomy dark clouds, but for this moment she was determined to enjoy herself. See the City that some called the greatest.

By lunchtime, a sandwich and a coke in an air-conditioned diner on a side street in midtown, she was exhausted, exhilarated and still very excited. The sandwich was triple-decker with half a dozen fillings, a million miles from the cheese sliced between two slices of white bread that was served in her work canteen. Nope this sandwich was an adventure!

She’d had a busy but productive morning, veering into Central Park before wandering down the Eastside of Manhattan past shops and hotels that were as familiar as her home town form the repeated appearances in films and TV shows. Immediately before lunch, she’d scaled the Empire State Building. Via the lift as oppose to the King Kong route. She was planning on a bus tour after her meal.

And the beauty of being so busy was that she had no time to think about the man she’d left in Victoria. Phil was angry that she’d come to New York, he thought she should have stayed a few days longer and cleared things up with Chris. But she wasn’t ready to put time and effort into salvaging the unsalvageable. They were different, there was no future for them, and she had the stresses of a million people waiting for her back at home. That was her priority now.

She couldn’t afford to let Chris enter her head. Though he did. She saw him in crowds, heard his voice call out to her, but every where she looked there was a different man, not as tall, or not as handsome, or not as funny. Each time a lancing pain hit her chest and took her breath away, but she chose to ignore that.

After lunch Chloe travelled on several buses, open topped tours, taking in as much as she could of this vibrant town. Not for the first time she wished she was here with company so that she could explore the nightlife as energetically as she had the day time. Saying that, she adjusted her sandals as she took a tube back to her hotel, her feet were killing her. She wanted a shower, maybe some dinner, then an early night.

The shower was invigorating and her grimy skin from a day in the City loved the experience. But it did make her tired, and she deliberated leaving the room again. Room service was expensive and the selection poor plus had sworn to herself that she’d make the most of the trip to the Big Apple, so she dressed and headed back out into the City.

She’d barely taken a dozen steps from the front of the hotel when she heard her name, a voice that sounded like Chris, for the umpteenth time that day. Refusing to fall for any more tricks from her subconscious, she marched away from the hotel determined to find a nice place where she could eat alone.

She’d got to the corner of the block, a place to deliberate on which direction to take, when she heard her name again. Definitely her name. Turning slowly, she froze her jaw opening in surprise. There jogging along the pavement towards her was Chris.

Once she was sure it wasn’t a trick of her mind, she drank him in greedily, despite turning him away, leaving him, he was beautiful, and she appreciated that for a moment.

                “I couldn’t let you go!” He breathed, “I didn’t think you’d leave so quickly.” He was struggling for breath.

                “I told you I had to go. I’m flying home in the morning.”

He took her hand and a jolt of warmth engulfed her, but she was wise to it, slipping her fingers free as he spoke, “I couldn’t let you go like that.”

Chloe groaned, “Chris, this is over...”

Shaking his head, he forced her to look at him, his hand tugging her chin towards him, “no it isn’t! I can’t let this end!”

With that he kissed her. And as with every other of their hundreds of kisses, he overwhelmed her. His mouth had the authority of familiarity as he devoured her lips, parted them, coaxed them to accept his tongue. When they parted with a gasp, he homed in, his hands pulling her into his hard body, his tongue invading her mouth, duelling with hers. Bliss.

Chloe was aware that they were kissing in the street. It was a vague thought, because this kiss was like no other they’d shared. She’d never believed that someone could explode...or maybe implode from just a kiss. But she was, and as she whimpered in a pathetic way, a way that made her wonder if she might start to plead, or beg, or maybe pant there in the street, she managed to pull free, but as she saw Chris’ smile she realised that he had let her go before she’d even contemplated pulling away.

                “Now,” he breathed, his forehead rested against hers. “Tell me that there’s nothing between us.”

                “So you kiss well!” She snapped, but her voice was a strangled croak, and he laughed again.

                “It’s more than a kiss!” When she shook her head, he leaned close to her ear, “and if I ran my hands up your thighs? What would I find?”

The heat that furled in her pelvis from the kiss threatened to floor her; she gripped her thighs together trying desperately to assuage the arousal, the desire that had engulfed her so dramatically. Her throat was dry, and she was unable to comment as he pulled her into the road, stopping a yellow cab.

She didn’t remember getting inside, but his lips in her throat, her ear, as the car swung through the Manhattan traffic was the centre of her universe, and then his fingers were climbing under the edge of her denim mini skirt...his favourite skirt.

                “Chris!” She breathed, “What are you doing?”

He sighed against her cheek, “just making sure that you come back to my apartment and talk to me.”

                “Your apartment?”

                “Uh-huh. It’s a few blocks away. And it guarantees you can’t run out on me again.”

By the time he unlocked the door, the desire for him outweighed any anger at his behaviour, or resistance at the conversation he wanted to have. As the door closed, she pounced on him, thrusting her tongue aggressively into his mouth, anchoring her hands in his hair.

                “We need to talk!” He gasped against her lips.

She shook her head, “you can’t load the gun and then not fire it!”

Reaching for his jeans, she started to unfasten them, pushing them away from his tanned thighs, pausing only briefly to admire the long heard length of him. With a grunt, his lips returned to hers, and then with a further groan, he lifted her, wrapped her legs around him. Chloe gasped as he thrust into her, when her mind drifted back from the fantasy world he’d taken her to, she could barely fathom that she was here, in an apartment with Chris after leaving him the other side of the country. Then he thrust again, his hands teasing her beyond belief as his body drove her higher and higher. It was explosive, satisfying, and when Chris finally lowered her to the floor, her legs gave way beneath her.

Laughing, he grabbed her and tossed her over his shoulder. The little she saw of the apartment as she tried to wriggle free, a small lounge/kitchen, gave way to a large bedroom. She barely took in the white walls and the equally white bed, as she bounced on to the surface in a rather unceremonious fashion.

Licking her dry lips, she watched as he reached for one of her ankles, pulling her shoe from her foot and tossing it over his shoulder, Chris sank his teeth into her instep. She could barely control her response, immediately after mind blowing sex, she was ready for more, wanting more.

Her other shoe followed, and with a heel in each hand, he peppered her calves with kisses, splitting the attention as equally as he could. All the while creeping closer to her. Chloe forgot all her misgivings; this was everything she knew Chris was, everything he could be. For a moment she wondered if she’d ever meet anyone, be with anyone as perfect as him again. Then she thought of all the crap she was about to face, all that was about to come out about her, and she knew that him never knowing would keep this as a special, special memory.

The distraction of thought had dragged her away from the sensation of his actions, and suddenly she was overwhelmed, over powered by him. His mouth...his tongue...she threw back her legs and let it transport her to another level.

Chris looked down at her, fast asleep in his arms and smiled. It had been a nightmare getting here. His coach was less than impressed, but he’d insisted. So he had two days literally. His flight left at ten am the following day. Not long, but once he knew from Phil the name of the hotel she was staying at, he had to do something. He didn’t imagine he’d be hanging around a street corner for the best part of the day, but now that she was here, in his arms...it all made sense, and was worth every moment.

They woke several times and made love in more ways than Chloe cared to remember. But as she opened her eyes in the morning, she knew she had to leave. She was dressing, trying desperately to find her underwear that was scattered somewhere in the small apartment, when Chris came looking for her.  He stood in the doorway, sleepy and sexy in just a pair of boxer shorts.

                “Running away?” he asked huskily.

She turned to him and took in his presence, for the rest of her life all she’d have was the memories of him, this moment, shaking her head, she finally found her knickers, and snatched for them...they were torn. “I was going to say goodbye,” she offered, “but I have to pack, my flight...”

He shrugged, “I’ve got a flight in three hours too. I just can’t believe you’ve avoided talking to me all night.” He rued his response to her, and knew she’d played him comprehensively.

                “Chris, this is over. You know that. I’m leaving...”

                “Nothing is permanent, later in the year I’ll be East Coast, a seven hour flight apart. It doesn’t have to end, it’ll be difficult...”

She held up a hand to silence him, “I can’t cope with that, I’ve had so much going on that I don’t think I can manage it. Not now.”

Reaching for her hands he looked at her desperately, “don’t say that. It’s worth it, it’s always worth it. We can make this work.”

Chloe shook her head, “I can’t do this Chris, I really can’t.” Shrugging free of his grasp, she found her bag and shoes and was at the door when he finally answered.

                “I love you Chloe, please don’t block me out.”

Her hand froze on the door knob, and she gulped for fresh air, eventually managing to turn slowly, “you can’t love me. Not yet, not now. You don’t know me...if you did you’d hate me not love me. This has been the best few weeks of my life, and I’ll never forget you...”

                “Tell me! Tell me what’s so awful that I’ll hate you, share things with me. Please?”

There were tears in his eyes, as he pleaded with her, but Chloe couldn’t imagine his seeing inside her, couldn’t think of him knowing her dark past, and most of all couldn’t bear to see the disappointment in his eyes.

Closing the door was the only way to preserve this time. That was her only option.