What about me? - 19

Chapter 19

For a moment Kate had taken in the sight of him greedily, he was like a mirage, an oasis in a desert, and she almost wanted to reach out and touch him, make sure he wasn’t an illusion. As his lips rolled up into the curve of a smile, she finally processed the fact that he was here, in front of her.

Then she reminded herself that she’d drunk dialled him three nights previously and she’d had no contact, no return call, nothing. He’d deliberately left her hanging on; she could now see that so clearly. If he was here for Christmas, he’d known he would be when she’d called, he could have phoned her, told her she’d be seeing him, but no. Had he wanted the element of surprise, wanted to wrong-foot her?

She didn’t know. All she knew was that she was livid!

                “Hey Kate. It’s so good to see you again.” He offered as some sort of olive branch.

                “’Hey Kate?’ You bastard!” she snarled. “You planned this, didn’t you? Let’s put Kate on the back foot again. I’m not some pawn in your stupid game Mason! This is my life you are screwing with!”

He raised an eyebrow, otherwise his face completely calm, “it’s not your LIFE I want to screw Kate...but then you know that.”

It was purely instinct that saw her hand fly up and aim for his face, but he was quick, and wise to her, intercepting easily. “Calm down or I’ll have to start calling you Kat!”

She could feel her nose wrinkle in anger, knew that she was baring her teeth, but she didn’t care. “Get out of my way. You’re so despicable!” hearing his snigger only riled her more. With a huff and a nose pushed in the air, she stormed past him, but was unable to ignore the words he breathed.

                “God you’re horny when you’re angry.”

Kate felt as though she were about to explode. She felt such contempt for him, but she couldn’t deny the effect of seeing him looking so good was having on her. Handing him a look that could kill, she continued into the elaborate hallway. As she unbuttoned her coat and made to hang it up with the others, a door opened from the lounge and Peter emerged.

In typical Peter fashion, he skipped across the hall, delight on every inch of his face, “Kate! I’ve been waiting for you to come FOREVER!” He announced before throwing his arms around her neck.

As she circled her arms around him in a reciprocal manner, she glanced up to see Mason, the sureness and confidence long gone. In fact Kate was almost relieved to see that spark of jealousy in his eyes.

Breaking the embrace with Peter, she allowed him to take her hand, and lead her into the lounge, babbling excitedly as they went. Christmas with the Wightman’s followed a similar pattern every year. Lots of alcohol in the morning, a very late lunch, then gifts during and after the meal. Every year there were four other guests after her, Peter and Clarissa, Margaret – who she now realised was Mason’s mother, Judith and Malcolm the nearest neighbours and their daughter Sarah, but Peter told her excitedly as she entered the heavily decorated room with the ornate tree and dozens of gifts, that the neighbours were in the Caribbean on a holiday. So it was just the four of them, plus his ‘wonderful’ cousin Mason, the pride in the words screamed of a rather ironic case of hero-worship, and she felt awful all over again.

Peter then excitedly pointed out all his gifts amongst the dozens under the tree. When Kate, after giving the appropriate amount of excitement turned around, Mason was lounging against the door frame watching the little drama unfold. Heat flushed her cheeks, partly through reaction to him; she’d never had anyone cause her to react like this, but also because he was witnessing the sham that her life was.

Again holding her nose high in the air she waltzed past him, but the doorway was narrow and she had to squeeze past him. He laid a hand on her shoulder, the most fleeting of touches but it almost stopped her dead in her tracks.            The zing of anticipation of that hand moving a little more. AS she took a steadying deep breath and kept moving, Mason chuckled. No words, no goading just a husky laugh.

Mason watched her go and smiled to himself, at this moment he knew she hated him, but since his Aunt Clarissa had confided that Kate was changing things, that she was asking for help with Peter he’d known that his harsh words had hit home and she was standing up for herself. It had been torture keeping away from her, especially when she’d left that forlorn drunk message. It had more than pulled at his heart strings. But she had to make that stand herself, he didn’t want to be involved in it, there was a time and a place for them, all this had to be her doing.

So why goad her so much? He was wondering that himself, but he knew that it was the only way for her to know he was interested without dragging her off to bed. But he’d also been amazed at the response to finally seeing her. His body had been ‘alert’ to put it mildly since she’d walked through the door. He’d intended for nothing to happen whilst they were here, but as she brushed past him, lighting a fire throughout his body, he wasn’t honestly sure how strong his resolve was.

Kate was in the kitchen for a long time, reacquainting with the woman she hadn’t known was Mason’s mother, and Peter’s mother. They were both loving the cooking as usual; there was literally food on every surface. Peter had drifted off to his room as he had a habit of doing, as much as he was mentally stimulated at the Residential Centre, there was something he must find comforting in his childhood bedroom and he often disappeared there when he was home. His mother had installed a video baby monitor to keep an eye on him, and Kate glanced over to the screen and noticed him sat cross legged on his bed surrounded by his tools. He loved tinkering with anything electrical, and it was the only time he was happy alone.

                “Why don’t you get Mason to take you to the pub?” Margaret his mother offered, seeing Kate look at the screen. “You two are too young to be stuck here with us old fuddy-duddy’s! Peter’s happy, and we’re busy preparing lunch.”

As Kate was making excuses, Mason walked up behind her, “look at you two! How many sherry’s have you had already?”

Clarissa giggled as she reached for her small glass, “not that many Mason!  You’re mother was just suggesting that you take Kate to the pub. Peter’s busy, dinner will be a while, and Christmas morning at the Ship is particularly fun!”

Mason smiled at Kate, “sounds perfect, it’s cold though, so wrap up warm!”

Kate realised to protest too strongly would be a mistake. So reluctantly she agreed and found her coat. Her hat and gloves were in the car along with her gifts, so she retrieved them and was re-entering the house when Mason appeared, dressed for the winter in a beanie hat and a thick ski jacket.

                “You ready”?

Kate scowled before lowering the gifts to a side table, “as I’ll ever be!” With that she marched out ahead of him. They’d not reached the end of the driveway when he caught up with her.

                “What’s with the frosty reception Kate?”

She stopped and turned to him hands on hips ready to explode, “I called you three days ago, you’ve not as much as sent me a text message back. Then I turn up here and you’re here too. You could have told me, warned me, let me be prepared!”

He laughed and the sound only irked her more, “the last time I saw you, you took great pleasure in telling me how much you hated me, never wanted to see me again. So forgive me if I didn’t reply to an obviously drunk message. What was it? I’m drunk where’s my shag? Is that what I am?”

                “I didn’t say that...I just...”

He could see the conflict in her eyes and decided to put her out of her misery, “look. You needed time to sort your own head out, I hear from Aunt Clarissa that you seem to be doing that. I didn’t want to complicate things. If I was around when you made those choices you may resent me in the future. I don’t want that for us!”

                “There is no us!” She announced storming off, and Mason was happy to slowly stroll after her and let her calm down. Hitting the main road she turned right for the village. Before they reached the pub he took her arm and slowed her down.

                “If you knew I was coming you’d have been torn over what to do. You want to do right by Peter, but me being here is a complication. I know that, and I didn’t want to compromise you. But I wanted to see you, couldn’t resist it. And whilst I didn’t think you’d launch yourself into my arms, I kind of hoped after the phone call that you might have been a bit happier to see me!”

With that he opened the door to the bar and stepped into the chaotic room.

Kate paused for a second glad of the cacophony to distract from her reply to his comments, because everything he said made sense, and she was more than happy to see him, and now that she thought back to his earlier suggestive comments she blushed. This was going to be a very interesting Christmas.

She finally found Mason at the bar, but she couldn’t get close to him, it was five deep. So she slunk back to a pillar near the door and propped herself there until she saw him cutting through the crowd, two ice cold pints of lager in his hands.

                “I presumed that a beer was the call of the day, and there was too much of a queue to come and ask you.”

She accepted the drink with a half smile, “that’s fine, thanks!”

He sipped his drink, resting his shoulder next to her and smiling down at her, “so why did you call?”

With a groan she punched his arm, then sighed, “You know why I called, so don’t tease me!”

                “Maybe I just want to hear you say it!”

Kate was mortified, she’d never been great with showing her feelings, the last man she’d shared herself with was Peter, and Mason had been right, she’d hidden behind him for so long, and now she wasn’t sure how she managed to break down those barriers. She had palpitations at the thought of him knowing how she really felt.

                “Maybe you have to spend longer being nicer to me and I might forgive you!”

It was meant as a throw away comment, but at the immediate raising of his eyebrow she felt her heart start to race, fear and anticipation was causing nausea to rise in her throat. Then he lifted a hand and stroked her cheek, securing a tendril of hair behind her ear.

                “I can be very, very nice Kate, you know that!” The whispered words tied her insides up in knots.

Shrugging free of his hand she stepped away from him, “don’t! I’m still not comfortable with all this. I’ll be amicable, we can enjoy the day, but that’s it Mason. That’s it!”

The protests were a little OTT for the situation, but Kate felt she was walking a tightrope. She was so far away from her comfort zone that she was struggling to function. Everything she said or did seemed to have other meanings, implications and connotations. All she wanted was to deal with Christmas, get Peter to understand he’d be having more time with carers, less time with her, and then get back to her life.  

They drank in silence for a few moments, watching the locals interact, people laughed and joked, and there were some very obvious Christmas jumpers in the pub, and it was as one guy, probably mid thirties walked in wearing a knitted sweater, red with white snowflakes surrounding a reindeer, complete with antlers and a flashing red nose!  Kate started to snigger on seeing it, and very soon the two of them could barely stand for laughing.

                “I love it when you laugh,” He finally managed to whisper, “You just don’t do it often enough!”

Turning to smile at him, she added, “You’d be surprised!”

Nodding he lifted his drink to his lips, “You keep surprising me. Why did you phone?”

All Mason wanted was to hear the words ‘I was wrong’ or ‘I wanted to hear your voice’, but he could see the determination in her face as she shook her head.

                “I’m not answering any questions!”

Leaning close so that his lips were merely a breath away from her ear, he murmured, “Until you answer that question you can only imagine what reward it will bring...”

Kate gasped, her whole body tingled, throbbed at the thought of what those words meant, but she stood firm, merely giving a slight nod. They may both be desperate to rip each other’s clothes off, but she was sure of two things, it wouldn’t happen when Peter was around, and she wouldn’t make the first move.