Trying Not to Love You - Part Thirty Four

Chapter Thirty Four

Sonny loved watching Martha work the room; he did it so often, stood there in awe of her charisma and capability of managing huge crowds so competently. He’d had a traumatic afternoon, emotionally the up and coming week was making him nervous, not because he feared failure or because he worried about Marcus Thomas, the biggest concern for him was Martha, and Ethan. Getting that bastard locked up was exactly what he needed to help them, and without that, well it didn’t bear thinking about. Martha was already talking about leaving, and he’d love to go with her, convince her that he was right for her...for them, that was a battle in itself, but her leaving town, going back to being a mother was wholly dependent on him carrying the can, looking after her father and the restaurant.

He couldn’t see her get Ethan back AND be with her at the same time. That was if Oldbury was still around. He’d gone into this deal to find out what it was that Marcus had on him, he’d hinted that he knew more about Sonny that was pleasurable since day one, and finding that out, plus getting Oldbury in revenge had been everything. Now? Now her freedom and safety were his single motivation. That wasn’t bad for a man who’d spent the whole of his life doing what he wanted for purely selfish reasons.

She was ethereal tonight, in a dress, a tailored dress, something that fitted her well and those long legs were in heels. She glided around the room delivering meals and smiling to the patrons, she was an asset to any business, she’d be amazing if she stayed here and worked the restaurant. With Oldbury out of the equation would she? He wasn’t sure, she still had a life in London, and she may be just as keen to get back to that. The thought of life without her was painful, but that was the looming reality.

“You look like you’ve just lost a fortune!” She came to stand beside him and it pulled Sonny out of the depth of his thoughts.

“Just thinking, would you believe?”

She laughed, “sounds dangerous. You ready to clear the tables?”

Once everyone had eaten they had to pull back four tables to make room for the makeshift dance floor. Sonny smiled then called Paul over and the two of them started to move the furniture.

She was still watching him when he came back to stand beside her, “what?”

Laughing again she leaned in, “just thinking how much a suit suits you!”

Sonny groaned as she walked away. Every time he got over her, convinced himself that this was never happening, she threw a lifeline at him like that. He knew it may sound conceited, but she wouldn’t be paying him compliments if she wasn’t thinking about him, yet she pushed him away all the time. These mixed messages were killing him. He watched her across the room, talking to the party organiser, tonight the restaurant was filled with workers from a local factory, and they were talking about rebooking for a few months time. And she glanced up catching him off guard, and the look she gave him, the beaming smile, the searching eyes...set a bolt of heat through his body like a knife. How the hell was he going to cope with the rest of the evening?

                “I’m going to finish off some paperwork in the office, you ok out here?” It was busy but Sonny could easily cope with the bar, Sam one of the young waitresses and stayed to help, as usual Martha had let Paul go home to his family around ten.

                “Cope with our eyes closed,” Sonny reassured, “hey Sam?”

The young girl nodded enthusiastically, “you go do what you need to.”

Martha groaned at the devotion in the younger girl’s eyes, seemed Sonny had yet another fan, shaking her head she mouthed the word, “behave,” at Sonny, then disappeared into the office.

She’d needed to put that distance between them because the fact that they were going home to an empty house, alone, was having a wild affect on her libido. But there was no future in this, and after all that had happened with Scott she couldn’t let down her guard, couldn’t let Sonny get close. She needed him in the bigger picture, and being free to go home to Ethan was her imperative thought, he came first. She dismissed the memories of Sonny so perfect with her son, it wasn’t enough, she had an agenda, she was way off schedule, and getting home was everything. If her father could spend a weekend at the races, then he was ready to take on the farm and the restaurant, that much was obvious.

She thought of Ethan and felt real pain; she missed him with every breath she took. With a huge sigh, she turned back to the accounts for the restaurant, a thankless task.

                “Hardly anyone left, you ok?” Martha looked up to see Sonny at the office door. As she smiled he came across to her and rested a hip on the desk beside her, an invasion of her personal space, without being too obvious.

Pushing her chair back slightly recreating that distance she smiled, “fine, just got engrossed in numbers...which can’t be a bad thing.” He nodded, then moved his backside an inch further along the desk. “Carter.” She warned.

But that was met by a laugh, “what?”

Shaking her head she logged off the computer and closed the log books in front of her, “I’ll help clear up.”

As she stood, he stood too and they were mere inches apart. Martha swallowed, “Carter...don’t do this.”

                “What am I doing?”

Well not getting out of my personal space, she wanted to scream. Instead, she took a step back, only for him to follow. Match her pace for pace.

                “Carter, please.”

He sighed, “please what?” He lifted a hand to her jaw, his fingers setting off electric currents everywhere he touched. “Please kiss me?”

He lowered his face towards her, not touching but teasing. Martha could barely breathe for the tension, the desire. No one had ever had this affect on her, and she was struggling to concentrate, she tried to swallow, to moisten her suddenly dry mouth.

                “No,” her voice was hoarse and she could barely hear herself over the rapid pound of her heart...or was it his? He was close enough. “I thought we’d dealt with this, I thought we were over it.”

He laughed, “over it? No, I’m clearly not over it, and neither are you.” His husky voice was a breath against her cheek, sultry, seductive, and it cut through her defences like a sharp knife. “This isn’t just me Martha, you are throwing me mixed signals all the time...and I’m thinking that you’re the one hiding, and I can’t think why.”

Shaking her head to clear the fuzz, she closed her eyes, trying to eliminate his effect on at least one of her senses, “I’m not being defensive, I’m not hiding.”

He laughed at that, in the same husky tone, “you reckon? I know you Martha...better than anyone, and I can read you like a book.” Each nuance of change in her demeanour caused him to smile so she fought the need to lick her dry lips, to step back, to turn her head, each would play into his hands, instead she stayed completely still. “You want me, that is blatantly obvious, if I didn’t catch you checking out my arse whenever you think I’m not looking, the way your pulse is racing now would give it away.”

                “I don’t check you out!” She snapped, turning her head abruptly, a mistake as when she opened her eyes their noses were almost touching.

His eyes devoured hers, “but you’re flushed, your heart is racing...” he lowered his hand to her throat finding her rapid pulse with a look of satisfaction. “And you’re eyes are wide. You can play it all down till you’re blue in the face, but I know you...want...me.”

A tap preceded the door to the office swinging open and the two jumped apart as though they’d been scorched.

                “Sam?” Martha prayed that she seemed composed as she turned to the younger woman. “Ok?”

Sam nodded, looking between the two for a moment, “last people are just about to go.”

Sonny smiled, “I’ll take over in just a moment, can you just give us a minute?”

The girl nodded then left, but when Sonny turned back to face Martha, she’d retreated to the other side of the office.

                “You can’t run from this Martha, you may think you can, but I won’t let you.”

She shook her head then turned to him, “you can’t railroad me into something I don’t want.”

                “Don’t want?”

He marched across the office four long strides, then reached for her face, cupping it with both hands, then he thrust his lips onto hers, mashing them together in a blaze of passion and something so much more.

Martha was stunned, her body wanted to lean into him, her lips wanted to open to his, meet their rhythm, but she couldn’t...then his tongue darted out to nudge her lips at the same time his fingers moved over her scalp, it was the most erotic sensation she’d ever known, and as she sighed, he took full advantage.

Sonny was on fire, from the moment he’d kissed her he felt alive, wired and SO in tune with her every move. He knew the exact moment that he overwhelmed her defences, when her tension eased and she became pliant, and when that pliancy became demanding in her own way, hands on his chest, around to his shoulders, trails of fire everywhere they moved. It was him that pulled away; another moment and he’d be tearing her clothes off, not good with a dozen punters and a teenage waitress outside the door. They had a weekend together, and he had no need to rush this, or more importantly blow it.

He looked down at the invitation her face was, closed eyes, swollen parted lips, and that unbridled passion, in the split second before she sensed he’d pulled back. Then there was that immediate frown, regret.

                “You can’t deny that Martha, you really can’t.”

With a scowl she barged past him, her gait unsteady as she made for the door and Sonny smiled, she was rattled, but she wanted him, if he’d ever doubted that, he didn’t now. He’d make her see sense; between them they’d find a way to make this work. It was the only thing that he could imagine.