Trying Not to Love You - Part Ninety Six

Chapter Ninety Six

 

                “So have you got ideas?”

She turned to Sonny’s voice and gave a half smile, “there’s nothing I like more than interior decorating...”

                “But?” He walked across to Martha and slid his arms around her, pulling her into a kiss. When he finally lifted his lips, he smiled, “I sense a ‘but’?”

Sighing she nodded her head, “Henry called me this morning.” When he looked puzzled, she added, “Lucy’s old flame. I told you I contacted him, he really wants to meet her.”

                “Ah,” he nodded, “so what’s the problem?”

She sighed, “I haven’t told Lucy that I’ve looked for him, found him...she has no idea.”

He nodded knowingly, “seems it’s not just me that has to face up to things.”

That raised a laugh from Martha, “do not bracket me in with you, not even the same thing.”

He kissed her again, “god you get off on the power over me, don’t you?”

Another laugh preceded her smile, “power?” She shook her head, “I don’t need to wield any power over you. Do I?”

There was a challenge in her raised brow and it made him smile, “no. I’ll always obey your every command.”

She giggled at the sarcasm, “good, I meant what I said earlier, I won’t be shouted at by you.”

He nodded, “I kinda worked that out. I’ll be around for dinner, then we can discuss those rotas?”

                “Why are you being all quiet and coy?”

Martha looked up from her position making dinner to see Aunt Lucy leaning against the kitchen door frame.

                “How was town? Busy?”

Lucy eyed her up for a moment, “nice subject change, what’s going on?”

Martha laid down the knife she was using to peel potatoes, “well, I have a slight confession to make...you know we were talking about love, life...” When Lucy shrugged not sure where this conversation was going, Martha sighed, “Henry...”

Lucy paled, immediately, deathly white, “Martha...” Her voice was weak, shaky.

This is what Martha had feared, when she’d started on this she’d been broken hearted, desperate to deflect from her own misery. “You were so sad, and so was I...with the internet things are different.”

                “What have you done?”

As Martha looked at Lucy she felt sick, her aunt looked devastated, and very fragile.

                “I just put out a few feelers...and I found him.”

Lucy shook her head but didn’t say anything. Martha sighed, “I went to meet him a couple of weeks ago.”

Suddenly Lucy stormed forward, “WHAT?”

Martha smiled awkwardly, “I needed to know if it was the same man.”

                “Did I ask you to find him?”

Martha gasped at the venom in her aunt’s voice, “but you were sad...you said...”

Lucy shook her head, “NO. You didn’t think. I might talk wistfully about walking on the moon, that doesn't mean I want you to fly me there. You are out of order. What your life was shit so everyone else’s becomes fair game?”

                “Of course not! It was never like that...I just wanted to help.”

                “Well conspiring with someone from my past is not the way. I don’t know who you think you are, but you’re not the woman I remember.”

Then she was gone, leaving Martha stunned and devastated in equal measure.

An hour later Sonny turned up smiling, hand interlaced with Ethan’s, it was a treat for them both that Sonny collected him from school.

                “MUM! We’ve got a school trip...look!”

Ethan ran up to her waving a letter which she quickly gleaned was about a trip to a wild bird sanctuary the following week.

                “Some mothers can come with us. Do you want to come?”

She looked down at his happy face, “do you want me to come?”

He then shrugged in a ‘too cool for school’ kind of way, “of you want...can I watch Ben 10 before dinner?”

Martha nodded, hating that her smile was still sad.

                “What’s happened?” Sonny stalked across the room then paused with his hands on her shoulders kneading them in a supportive and calming way. She closed her eyes and relaxed into him, his body cradling her spine as she leaned against him.

                “Tried to tell Lucy, she stormed off. Called me all sorts...do I interfere?”

He turned her in his arms and she hated that she knew tears welled in her eyes, “you want to do right for everyone, cooking, cleaning, mothering, this is just another part of that. She doesn’t moan about the fridge being full, dinner being on the table...you haven’t got a malicious bone in your body. I know that, and I guarantee that SHE knows that too!” He pulled her close, “she’ll realise that, it must be a terrible shock to her.”

His lips found hers, and she immediately felt the tingle in her toes, the thrill in her heart, and the voice of Ethan caused them to pull apart.

                “Well that cheered me up.”

He grinned, “good. It doesn’t take things away, but if it makes you feel better...” he lowered his head to whisper in her ear, “to know what will be coming when we’re alone, then that’s a winner.”

They’d had dinner and Sonny read a bedtime story to Ethan before he was needed back in the pub. He hated leaving Martha when she was this low, but he had no choice, he had to work, and she knew that. When they were living above the pub it would be easier, he could be up and down more often, she could come down and sit with him on quiet nights and when Ethan was in bed. Then he could be more supportive to her, because for as long as she needed him to be her strength, the less time he had to think about his own shit. And that wasn’t a great place for him mentally.

He loved the pub, it wasn’t like working, he met people, kept abreast of so many things, and felt that he was becoming part of the village the longer that he stayed there. And thankfully it was still as busy as it always had been, the contempt that so many had for him for his first six months in the area seemed to have faded, and that was due to the acceptance of the Mansell’s he knew that. No one knew much about him, and very few knew that he was the long lost son of Michael Oldbury, but then Michael was very private, and he rarely set foot in the building. That suited Sonny, particularly at the moment.

He couldn’t think back to the seven weeks he spent in that flat with Jade, and the conversation he overheard. Martha was convinced that he was over reacting, reading more into things, but he had gone with his gut instinct, and his so called father discussing the lies that Jade had told so calmly meant he believed that there was more to it than met the eye. Because you’re gut instinct has been so reliable the last few months, he questioned himself. Listening to others, giving in to ‘do the right thing’ about Martha, then believing Jade, choosing to be with her, and Michael.

The door opened and a few people came into the pub, serving them helped him put his internal monologue on hold.

By ten o’clock it was getting quiet. It was a cold dark night and people were obviously spending the evening in the warmth of their homes. Lots had left, though half a dozen men sat at one of the corner tables, papers spread out between them and empty glasses mounting beside them.

Hearing the door open, he looked up and was surprised at seeing Lucy stood there, but that soon turned to concern as he saw how pale she looked, how troubled her eyes were. Meeting her half way, he led her to a stool near the bar, but in a place where she wasn’t in the glare of the men who were present. Before she could speak he poured her a sherry and waved away her hand when she tried to offer him money.

                “Drink that, it’ll make you feel a bit better.”

He watched as she nodded then sipped the drink, “where have you been? Martha’s been calling all night worried sick.”

Lucy rolled her eyes, “you sure about that?”

He shook his head in dismay, “I don’t want to argue with you Lucy.”

                “Then don’t.”

He contemplated that for a moment, “and you never interfere with me, what I’m doing?”

Lucy laughed, “YOU need guidance, you’re too hot-headed.”

                “And you’re not?” he leaned on the bar facing her. “You’ve been AWOL all evening, most of the day. Your niece is worried sick. You never do things like this, so we KNOW it’s because you’re angry with her.”

                “Angry doesn’t come close!” She scowled, and Sonny would have laughed if he wasn’t so angry himself.

He reached out for her hands, squeezing them in his own, “look, she may have overstepped a mark, but you KNOW her Lucy. She’s not got a malicious bone in her body, and she doesn’t deserve the silent treatment and the cold shoulder.”

                “No? That’s the sort of thing you’d do!”

It was a childish retort and he couldn’t control the smile at that, “really? Come on, she wants you to be happy; she saw a way of doing that. Maybe she shouldn’t have, but all I know is that she doesn’t do things to be nasty.”

She huffed, then stared at him, “maybe I don’t want my biggest mistakes and regrets coming up and biting me on the nose. Maybe I’ve put Henry to bed in the recesses of my mind a long time ago.”

                “Maybe you did...so just say no you don’t want to see him. That’s it. Done.” He watched her for a moment, “but aren’t you just the s lightest bit curious?”

She rolled her eyes and waved the glass at him for another drink, and it was fifteen minutes before he could return to her.

                “Well?” She looked at him quizzically, so he added, “are you even the smallest but curious?”

She shrugged, but he could see her earlier anger had waned.

                “I’m going back to the flat once I close up here...” he looked at his watch. “Twenty minutes. You hold on for me?”

She thought about it for a moment then nodded, and Sonny let out a breath that she hadn’t realised she was holding, if she came back with him he’d make her talk. Martha needed her to be honest; she’d been devastated when she’d called earlier.

Martha was sat on the sofa her arms wrapped around her knees rocking herself anxiously. She looked up when he walked into the lounge, then half smiled with relief as she spotted Lucy behind him.

                “Oh Aunt Lucy, you’re home. I’ve been out of my mind with worry.”

Lucy brushed off her concern, but Sonny from his position still near the door could see that Lucy was happy with the attention of Martha.

                “I’m going to bed; I’ve got an early start.” He looked between them and then gave a wink, “don’t kill each other or anyone else. Ok?”

Martha smiled at that, but didn’t comment on the surprise he knew she’d be experiencing at him going to bed so early. Thankfully he had a book beside his bed, he’d read a couple of chapters whilst listening to make sure neither killed the other.